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The Joy of Reconciliation. Reflection for marriages. Luke 15:1-10

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From the Gospel according to Luke 15:1-10
The tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to listen to Jesus, but the Pharisees and scribes began to complain, saying, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”  So Jesus addressed this parable to them. “What man among you having a hundred sheep and losing one of them would not leave the ninety-nine in the desert and go after the lost one until he finds it? And when he does find it, he sets it on his shoulders with great joy and, upon his arrival home, he calls together his friends and neighbors and says to them, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost sheep.’  I tell you, in just the same way there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous people who have no need of repentance.
“Or what woman having ten coins and losing one would not light a lamp and sweep the house, searching carefully until she finds it? And when she does find it, she calls together her friends and neighbors and says to them, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found the coin that I lost.’  In just the same way, I tell you, there will be rejoicing among the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

The Joy of Reconciliation

Lord, You never are never tired of seeking us. You do not reject us because of our mistakes, and You rejoice when we return to You. God’s love is the love of someone who persistently searches for what has been lost until it is found.

Even when we distance ourselves from You, when we stumble or feel unworthy of God’s love, You always come looking for us and invite us to return to Your Heart.

Jesus, You teach us that no one is excluded from Your divine mercy. You do not look only at our falls; You also see our ability to get back up and begin again. We must never forget that we are immensely precious in God’s eyes.

In our married life, You call us to discover that love does not simply mean walking together when everything is going well, but also reaching out to our spouse when something comes between us.

Sometimes we wait for the other person to take the first step: to apologise, acknowledge their mistake, change their attitude or reach out to us. But Lord, You show us that we must put aside our pride and place the value of our marriage sacrament and our desire to restore communion above it.

Married love is called to be a place where we can acknowledge our weaknesses without fear of being humiliated.

In marriage, we also need to celebrate the little moments of coming back together: an honest conversation after an argument, a humble apology, a loving touch that breaks down the distance, or a shared decision to move forward.

And when we rediscover the joy of being together, teach us to give thanks, because every reconciliation is an opportunity for Your love to dwell among us once again.

Applied to Married Life

Tony: Mia! Come and sit down. I have something important to tell you.

Mia: You sound excited! I’m coming. Tell me what’s happened.

Tony: Lewis has called me to say that he isn’t leaving home after all. He’s given it a lot of thought and has decided to keep fighting for his marriage.

Mia: What wonderful news! When we were with them the other day, it seemed as though there was nothing more we could do. They had completely lost hope.

Tony: I was surprised too. He told me that after talking to us, he kept thinking about everything we had said, and something stirred in his heart telling him that he shouldn’t give up.

Mia: The Lord has done great things once again, using us, His unworthy instruments, to carry out His work.

Tony: That’s right. He thanked me over and over again and told me that he and Christine would like to see us again. They know they can’t do it alone and need our help to rebuild their marriage.

Mia: That’s amazing! The Lord and Our Lady never consider any marriage a lost cause. I need to ask for forgiveness because I had lost all hope. The day after we were with them, I called Christine and she told me she didn’t want to speak to me anymore because everything had already been decided.

Tony: Well, now you can see that wasn’t the case! We’ve arranged to have dinner with them tonight. They want to tell us everything. Lewis told me that Christine was going to call you, but she would rather tell you in person.

Mia: Perfect! Do you think we could go to Mass together before meeting them, to give thanks to God, join in the celebration in Heaven for this marriage, and ask Him to guide us as we continue to accompany them?

Mother,

No matter how far away from Your Son we may think we are, His Love continues to seek us. And when we return to Him, Heaven is filled with joy.

Praised be God!

A Decision. Reflection for marriages. Luke 14:25-33

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From the Gospel according to Luke 14:25-33

Great crowds were traveling with Jesus, and he turned and addressed them, “If anyone comes to me unwilling to sacrifice his love for his father and mother,  wife and children, brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. Which of you wishing to construct a tower does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if there is enough for its completion?  Otherwise, after laying the foundation and finding himself unable to finish the work the onlookers should laugh at him and say, ‘This one began to build but did not have the resources to finish.’  Or what king marching into battle would not first sit down and decide whether with ten thousand troops he can successfully oppose another king advancing upon him with twenty thousand troops?  But if not, while he is still far away, he will send a delegation to ask for peace terms.  In the same way, everyone of you who does not renounce all his possessions cannot be my disciple.”

A Decision

All we have to do is look around us to realise how many things try to awaken our desires and capture our attention: advertising, special offers, mobile phone notifications, social media… Everything seems designed to seduce us, make us want more, and turn our desires into consumption. How different Jesus is! When an enthusiastic crowd follows Him, He does not try to keep their enthusiasm alive with pleasing words. On the contrary, He turns to them and speaks clearly about what it means to follow Him; He speaks of renunciation and the cross. He enlight them with two situations: a man who wants to build a tower and a king who considers whether he is prepared for battle. Following Jesus requires determination, perseverance, and a willingness to fight against ourselves. How good Jesus is! He neither deceives us nor hides the demands of the journey from us. Rather, He uses our enthusiasm to win our hearts and teach us how to love. And what about us? Do we follow Him because of the excitement we feel about what He is doing in our lives, because we hope He will grant us what we desire, or because we are truly willing to let Him transform our hearts?
Lord, today I want to ask You to make Your home in my heart; to put my desires in order, free me from my attachments, and teach me to love as You do.

Applied to married life

Luke: Ever since we went on the Marital Love Project retreat, I’ve been looking at our marriage differently. This is about so much more than simply getting along… We were missing out on the supernatural life that God wants to give us.
Bella: That’s why I don’t want the retreat to remain just something we liked. We need to make a commitment. We can’t leave the tower half-built, can we?
Luke: We need to take a step forward. I suggest we join a group to continue the Proyecto Amor Conyugal catechesis and commit ourselves to helping others discover the wonder of marriage…
Bella: That excites me… but it won’t be easy. There will be Saturdays when we can’t be bothered to go out, when we have other plans, and when comments from our family make us doubt ourselves.
Luke: I know. We’ll have to fight against ourselves and against that habit of putting God off until it suits us… This is the battle Jesus speaks about. We’ll have to deny ourselves time and time again. But if we want the Lord to transform us, it’s not enough to come back from the retreat feeling enthusiastic.

Mother

Help our love to be more than just words. Blessed are you for accompanying us on this journey!

Don’t keep God Waiting. Reflections for marriages. Luke 14:15-24

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From the Gospel according to Luke 14:15–24

One of those at table with Jesus said to him, “Blessed is the one who will dine in the Kingdom of God.” He replied to him, “A man gave a great dinner to which he invited many. When the time for the dinner came, he dispatched his servant to say to those invited, ‘Come, everything is now ready.’ But one by one, they all began to excuse themselves. The first said to him, ‘I have purchased a field and must go to examine it; I ask you, consider me excused.’ And another said, ‘I have purchased five yoke of oxen and am on my way to evaluate them; I ask you, consider me excused.’ And another said, ‘I have just married a woman, and therefore I cannot come.’ The servant went and reported this to his master. Then the master of the house in a rage commanded his servant, ‘Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in here the poor and the crippled, the blind and the lame.’ The servant reported, ‘Sir, your orders have been carried out and still there is room.’ The master then ordered the servant, ‘Go out to the highways and hedgerows and make people come in that my home may be filled. For, I tell you, none of those men who were invited will taste my dinner.’”

Don’t Keep God Waiting

God the Father invites us to a life of feasting and joy, yet we reject His invitation, thinking we have a better plan, that our way of thinking is better than God’s, that our way of living is better than the life He offers us, and that our way of building our marriage is better than the one God intended for us… And yet, we are not happy! That is how the prodigal son ended up eating the food of pigs instead of enjoying the happiness of his father’s house! What a great mystery! The creature rejects its Creator. The son rejects his Father’s invitation. Imagine a father who has given all his love to his son and, longing to share all his happiness with him, prepares a great feast. Everything is ready, and he eagerly awaits his son’s arrival… but his son does not come. He has other things to do, other priorities. How deeply that father would suffer at his son’s rejection! The son believes he can achieve happiness on his own and fill his heart with joy. The same thing happens to us. We lose ourselves in worries, work, material possessions, and even human relationships in this world, while we leave God waiting and, with Him, our true happiness awaits. In our vocation to marriage, the Lord calls us to something wonderful: to receive that divine Love which the world cannot give us, so that we can give it to our spouse and thus share in a new life, the divine life. Let us not keep our Father waiting any longer! Let us receive His Love today and give it to our spouse today. The feast is already prepared!

Applied married life

Olivia and Brian are meeting with some couples they accompany and sharing their testimony with them.
Olivia: When we first came to Marital Love Project, our marriage was practically destroyed. We had spent more than ten years just surviving, without knowing how to get out of that situation.
Brian: And the worst part was that we thought the other person was the problem. I was convinced that if Olivia changed, we would be happy.
Olivia: And I thought exactly the same! We spent our days judging each other, making demands, and throwing things back in each other’s faces… We neither understood one another nor forgave one another wholeheartedly.
Brian: And yet, we went to Mass every Sunday…
Olivia: Yes, but we were living according to the world’s standards. Each of us was focused on ourselves, on our rights, and on what the other person was failing to give us. We didn’t know how to love!
Brian: Until we discovered that we were trying to live our marriage without God. We weren’t relying on His grace, seeking His perspective, or asking ourselves how Jesus would act in our place so that we could act as He would.
Olivia: We wanted to be happy, but we were rejecting the very Love that could make us happy. What a paradox! Just like the guests in the Gospel, who thought they had a better plan than their Father’s banquet!
Brian: And when we began to receive His Love and see each other as Christ sees us, everything started to change.
Olivia: We still have our weaknesses today, but we no longer want to live for ourselves. We want to learn to love as He does, and that is changing everything.
Brian: And we can assure you of one thing: there is no happiness comparable to the happiness the Lord is giving us in our marriage!

Mother,

Help us to never exchange the banquet of Love for the crumbs the world offers us. Praised be the Lord, who never tires of calling us!

From Eternity. Reflections for marriages. John 14:1-6

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From the Gospel according to John 14: 1–6
Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also. And you know the way to where I am going. Thomas said to him, “Lord, we do not know where you are going. How can we know the way?” Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

From Eternity
Jesus confronts the restlessness of our hearts with the promise of eternal life. And how small the problems that overwhelm us so much today will seem when we look back on them from eternity! Perhaps my husband is obsessed with keeping everything tidy, or perhaps I have to give up my weekend plans because my wife needs to look after my mother-in-law… How many little things steal our peace and cause us suffering! And often, it is because our vision is too limited, because we become trapped in our own expectations and forget to lift our eyes towards the promise Jesus has made to us: a dwelling place in the Father’s house. But how do we get there? Our eternity is at stake in the small and great decisions we make each day, especially in the way we love. And thankfully, Jesus tells us quite clearly: “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” What a wonderful discovery it is that we do not have to look for this way far away from our everyday lives! In the Heart of Jesus, every act of self-denial, every gesture of patience, every opportunity to forgive, and every small sacrifice we make for our spouse can become a step towards heaven. For eternal life does not begin after this life; we begin to taste it here and now, when we allow Jesus to transform our hearts and the way we love. And so, hand in hand with our spouse, and often precisely thanks to them, we begin to enter into the supernatural life in the midst of our everyday routines. Our marriage becomes a path to heaven!

Applied to married life
Laura: Peter, another one of my parents’ carers has left, so this weekend I have to stay at their house again.
Peter: Oh, no! And you were so looking forward to taking the dog out to the countryside and enjoying the autumn…
Laura: I feel bad for you. You’ve been so busy all week, and now you have another weekend without being able to make any plans. And on top of that, you don’t even complain! You’re so good!
Peter: I wish I were! Of course, I feel like complaining and rebelling against it, but Jesus is the one who calms me and helps me see things differently. Besides, as our parish priest says, “Another metre added to our little plot in heaven!” Although, when I think about it, we are actually bringing heaven a little closer to earth with every step.
Laura: That’s so true! How beautiful this journey is, in which we discover opportunities to love even in the things that go wrong. And what a gift it is to walk this path together towards heaven!

 
Mother
Help us to look at every event in our day with our eyes fixed on Jesus, who is the Way, and to discover in the small sacrifices of our marriage an opportunity to love and draw closer to heaven. Praised be God!

An Offering of Love. Reflection for married couples. Luke 14:1, 7-11

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GOSPEL OF THE DAY

From the Gospel according to Luke 14:1, 7-11

On a sabbath Jesus went to dine

at the home of one of the leading Pharisees,

and the people there were observing him carefully.

He told a parable to those who had been invited,

noticing how they were choosing the places of honour at the table.

“When you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet,

do not recline at table in the place of honour.

A more distinguished guest than you may have been invited by him,

and the host who invited both of you may approach you and say,

‘Give your place to this man,’

and then you would proceed with embarrassment

to take the lowest place.

Rather, when you are invited,

go and take the lowest place

so that when the host comes to you he may say,

‘My friend, move up to a higher position.’

Then you will enjoy the esteem of your companions at the table.

For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled,

but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”

The Word of the Lord

An Offering of Love

Jesus, today You invite us to choose the lowest place. And in our marriage, that place is not for the one who is worth less, but for the one who chooses to become a gift for the other. How important it is to remain attentive! Seeking the first place does not always mean wanting to be in charge or imposing our own will. Sometimes it reveals itself in expecting the other person to recognise our efforts, in wanting to be right in an argument, or in asking for more attention, more understanding or more gratitude.

And, without even realising it, we begin to focus too much on ourselves. We see only what we lack, our sense of self grows, and we end up judging: “I do more… I suffer more… I am right…”

Today, Jesus, You propose a true revolution of the heart: to choose the lowest place willingly. Because when we accept that place, we begin to make ourselves small so that You may grow within us, and so that we may look upon our spouse with mercy and ask:

“My love, how can I help you? What do you need from me? What can I do to make you happy today?”

When we stop seeking recognition, we can discover a deeper communion, even if it does not happen straight away or if we do not receive the response we had hoped for.

Thank You, Lord, because through the sacrament of our marriage, we are called to live as a continual offering: each for the other, and both for You. My spouse becomes the very place where You call me to give my life.

May every moment of listening, every act of forgiveness and every hidden act of service, united with You, become an offering to the Father through Mary.

And so, as we stop placing ourselves at the centre, our marriage becomes an altar, our self-giving becomes an offering, and our life together becomes a path to holiness.

 

Applied to married life

Isabel: Nigel, after our argument yesterday, I found myself waiting for you to come to me. I kept thinking, “This time, it’s his turn to say sorry.” But I missed you… I wanted us to be close again, and yet I couldn’t bring myself to take that first step either. I just kept going over everything that had hurt me…

Nigel: I was exactly the same, Isabel. Going over all my reasons in my head, as if proving I was right was somehow going to make things better… And I didn’t stop to think about how you had felt. I’m sorry. I left it up to you to bring us back together, when I could have taken that step too.

Isabel: I’m sorry too. Today, listening to Jesus, I thought, “This is exactly what happens to us.” I realised that choosing the lowest place begins with me coming to you, even when I still find it difficult, without waiting for you to come to me first.

Nigel: Yes, Isabel… In the end, being right doesn’t mean much if it leaves us like this. I want to come closer to you too. Shall we ask the Lord to help us? I don’t want to sit back and wait for you to take the first step. Come, let’s pray together.

 

Mother,

receive our self-offering into your hands and present it to the Father, united with the offering of your Son. Blessed and praised are You for ever, Lord.