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To be born anew, again and again. Reflection for marriages John 3:1–8

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A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 3:1–8

There was a Pharisee named Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews.
He came to Jesus at night and said to him,
“Rabbi, we know that you are a teacher who has come from God,
for no one can do these signs that you are doing
unless God is with him.”
Jesus answered and said to him,
“Amen, amen, I say to you,
unless one is born from above, he cannot see the Kingdom of God.”
Nicodemus said to him,
“How can a man once grown old be born again?
Surely he cannot reenter his mother’s womb and be born again, can he?”
Jesus answered,
“Amen, amen, I say to you,
unless one is born of water and Spirit
he cannot enter the Kingdom of God.
What is born of flesh is flesh
and what is born of spirit is spirit.
Do not be amazed that I told you,
‘You must be born from above.’
The wind blows where it wills,
and you can hear the sound it makes,
but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes;
so it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.

To be born anew, again and again
When Jesus speaks of “being born again”, it is a direct call to each one of us: love cannot be sustained only by what it was at the beginning; it needs to be reborn constantly. The “yes” of the wedding day is not enough — we must choose one another again.
Nicodemus thinks in a literal way (“How can one return to the womb?”), just as we often do: “this is just how it is”, “this is how I am”, “this is how the relationship is”. But Jesus opens up another dimension: it is not about repeating the past, but about allowing something new to happen from within. We must allow love to be purified (water), cleansing wounds, resentments, and reproaches; and we must allow love to be lifted up (Spirit). Jesus speaks of the Spirit, confirming that this new birth is not something we achieve by ourselves, but something that is accomplished in Him. In fact, “to be born” is a verb that hides its passivity, because properly speaking, “we are born”: we owe our birth to our mother, who labours and brings us into life. And this new birth we owe to the Holy Spirit, who gradually disposes us towards a different way of living — a way of living in the freedom God originally dreamed for us, enabling us to love more freely, more patiently, and more generously.
Jesus reminds us that if a relationship remains only at a superficial level (attraction, routine, cohabitation), it becomes impoverished (“What is born of the flesh is flesh…”). But when the “Spirit” enters — self-giving, forgiveness, openness to the other as they are — love is transformed. A living marriage is one that allows itself to be renewed time and again, one that learns to “be born again” together, even after crises, weariness, or the passing of years.

Applied to married life:
Paloma: Alfonso… I feel that lately we’ve been on autopilot, don’t you? As if everything has become routine.
Alfonso: Yes… like when I put the car on autopilot… although ours doesn’t even have that.
Paloma: (laughs) Something like that… but seriously, it saddens me that we might lose what we once had.
Alfonso: Me too. But I was thinking today… perhaps we need to “start again”.
Paloma: Start again? That reminds me of “being born again”… as if God were giving us another opportunity within the same marriage.
Alfonso: Another opportunity? Are we going to have another marriage now? At our age, that sounds exhausting.
Paloma: (smiles) Silly… no, seriously. I think it means allowing God to renew what we have from within — not just changing external things.
Alfonso: So… fewer arguments about silly things and more… loving each other better?
Paloma: Yes. Clearing away what weighs us down… and making space for something new. As if love could begin again, but more deeply — asking God for help, because on our own we won’t manage.
Alfonso: Well, I could do with that… because sometimes there’s more “flesh” than “spirit” in me.
Paloma: That happens to all of us. But if we let God breathe… even if we cannot control it, He can do something beautiful in us.
Alfonso: So… shall we begin again?
Paloma: Let us choose each other again. And this time, with God at the centre.
Alfonso: Alright… but just so it’s clear — if we are “born again”, I’m not changing any nappies!
Prayer

Mother,

grant that, like you, we may trust even when we do not understand everything, and allow the Spirit to renew our lives.
Blessed are you, Lord, for these lights you inspire within us.

Mercy, our God. Reflection for marriages John 20:,19-31

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From the Gospel according to John20:19-31

On the evening of that first day of the week,when the doors were locked, where the disciples were,for fear of the Jews,Jesus came and stood in their midstand said to them, “Peace be with you.”When he had said this, he showed them his hands and his side.The disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord.Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you.As the Father has sent me, so I send you.”And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them,“Receive the Holy Spirit.Whose sins you forgive are forgiven them,and whose sins you retain are retained.”
Thomas, called Didymus, one of the Twelve,was not with them when Jesus came.So the other disciples said to him, “We have seen the Lord.”But he said to them,“Unless I see the mark of the nails in his handsand put my finger into the nailmarksand put my hand into his side, I will not believe.”
Now a week later his disciples were again insideand Thomas was with them.Jesus came, although the doors were locked,and stood in their midst and said, “Peace be with you.”Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands,and bring your hand and put it into my side,and do not be unbelieving, but believe.”Thomas answered and said to him, “My Lord and my God!”Jesus said to him, “Have you come to believe because you have seen me?Blessed are those who have not seen and have believed.”
Now, Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciplesthat are not written in this book.But these are written that you may come to believethat Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God,and that through this belief you may have life in his name.

The Gospel of the Lord

Mercy, our God

It is striking to see how, just a few days earlier, the disciples entered Jerusalem full of excitement and human expectations, following a “triumphant” Messiah and feeling part of a “successful project.” The Cross shatters all of that.
Now they are locked away, afraid, confused… and confronted with their own weakness. They have gone from expecting things from God to needing God Himself. What a great blessing! Yes, it is now that they are ready to receive the Love that comes to meet them in their misery.
Today we celebrate the Mercy of our God—His “Plan of Love” in our history.

Applied to married life

A prayer of a married couple before the Blessed Sacrament:
Lord, today we come to You as husband and wife, in the midst of this cross that we struggle to understand.It weighs on us, it hurts… and so often we don’t know how to carry it.
We recognize that we have tried to sustain our marriage with our own strength, demanding from each other what only You can give.And today we see that we cannot do it on our own.
So we ask for Your help, our Lord.Come and stand between us.Hold together what is breaking, heal what is wounded, and bring light to what we do not understand.
Teach us to look more at You than at our difficulties, and to walk together toward You—even in the midst of pain.
We surrender our need to “fix things” so that You may act within us.Lord, in You we trust!


Mother,

Teach us to trust in the plan of your Son.Forever blessed and praised be He who redeemed us with His Blood.

Go out to the whole world. Reflection for marriages Mark 16:9-15.

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From the Gospel according to Mark16:9–15

When Jesus had risen, early on the first day of the week,he appeared first to Mary Magdalene,out of whom he had driven seven demons.She went and told his companions who were mourning and weeping.When they heard that he was aliveand had been seen by her, they did not believe.
After this he appeared in another formto two of them walking along on their way to the country.They returned and told the others;but they did not believe them either.
But later, as the Eleven were at table, he appeared to themand rebuked them for their unbelief and hardness of heartbecause they had not believed thosewho saw him after he had been raised.He said to them, “Go into the whole worldand proclaim the Gospel to every creature.”
The Gospel of the Lord

Go out to the whole world
Jesus told us: “You are my friends if you do what I command you” (Jn 15:14). And in this Gospel, the risen Christ urges us to proclaim the Good News to the whole world: Jesus Christ is risen—He has conquered death!
We are witnesses to Christ’s Resurrection in our marriage—we have seen it and we are living it. We cannot remain silent! Spouses, let us go out into the whole world to proclaim the joy of the Resurrection: to our family, friends, acquaintances, at work, in our social lives—in every corner of our daily reality—announcing the Gospel of marriage, because that is our world. Through our witness, through the example of our lives, we must proclaim the Good News of marriage to everyone.

Applied to married life:

Rose: You know what? I’m so happy. This morning a colleague came to me and said that she and her husband were thinking about getting divorced. She asked me what had happened to me lately, because I seem so joyful and never complain about you anymore. So I told her about the beauty of marriage as God intended it, about the possibility of going on a retreat, of giving each other another chance… and I think she might suggest it to her husband.
Alfie: Rose, my dear, maybe you shouldn’t mix marriage topics with your work.
Rose: When Christ asked us to proclaim the Gospel, He didn’t exclude places or moments. He told us to go out into the whole world and proclaim it to all creation.
Alfie: Considering how hard it was for you to get that job, don’t you think you might be overexposing yourself?
Rose: Remember today’s first reading, Alfie—when the apostles were forbidden to preach in Jesus’ name, and they replied that they must obey God rather than men. Besides, when you’ve discovered the greatness of marriage in your own life, you simply can’t keep it to yourself.
Alfie: That’s true. Sometimes human fears hold me back. But it’s wonderful that your coworkers have noticed the change in us—and I admire your courage. You’re right: we’ve discovered the greatness of our marriage, and we shouldn’t be afraid to be witnesses to what God has done in us.

Mother,

Teach us to live always doing the will of the Father, proclaiming the Word of the Son without fear of the world or its consequences, but abandoning ourselves to His providence, just as you always did. Blessed and glorious are you, Mother! Praise be the Lord forever!

In you I trust . Reflection for marriages. John 21:1-14

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From the Gospel according to John 21:1–14
Jesus revealed himself again to his disciples at the Sea of Tiberias.
He revealed himself in this way.
Together were Simon Peter, Thomas called Didymus, Nathanael from Cana in Galilee,
Zebedee’s sons, and two others of his disciples.
Simon Peter said to them, “I am going fishing.”
They said to him, “We also will come with you.”
So they went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing.
When it was already dawn, Jesus was standing on the shore; but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus. Jesus said to them, “Children, have you caught anything to eat?”
They answered him, “No.”
So he said to them, “Cast the net over the right side of the boat and you will find something.”
So they cast it, and were not able to pull it in
because of the number of fish.
So the disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, “It is the Lord.”
When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord,
he tucked in his garment, for he was lightly clad,
and jumped into the sea.
The other disciples came in the boat,for they were not far from shore, only about a hundred yards, dragging the net with the fish.
When they climbed out on shore, they saw a charcoal fire with fish on it and bread.
Jesus said to them, “Bring some of the fish you just caught.”
So Simon Peter went over and dragged the net ashore full of one hundred fifty-three large fish.
Even though there were so many, the net was not torn.
Jesus said to them, “Come, have breakfast.”
And none of the disciples dared to ask him, “Who are you?” because they realized it was the Lord.
Jesus came over and took the bread and gave it to them, and in like manner the fish.
This was now the third time Jesus was revealed to his disciples after being raised from the dead.
The Gospel of the Lord

In You I trust

The apostles relive another moment of a miraculous catch of fish. The first time was when the Lord called Simon Peter to follow Him, at the beginning of His public ministry. There, He invited him to leave his nets behind and become a fisher of men.
Now the scene repeats itself: without their Master, the apostles return to the life they had once left behind. They go fishing—and once again, they catch nothing. In that moment, Jesus appears and tells them to cast the net again, and it comes up completely full of fish. Even so, the only one who recognizes the Lord is the beloved disciple, who then bears witness to the others.
In the same way, we are called to trust in the Lord and to be witnesses—especially when our spouse’s faith may falter.

Applied to married life

Ana: Martin I can’t take it anymore! This is the last time I’m saying it—are you even listening to me?
Martin: Hard not to—I hear you, and so do the neighbors. But tell me, love, what’s going on?
Ana: You’re right… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have shouted at you. And thank you for not responding in the same tone—we could’ve ended up in a big argument like we used to.
Martin: Come here, sit with me and tell me what’s wrong. (He hugs her as she sits down, knowing it comforts her.)
Ana: Oh… this feels so good. This is exactly what I needed. Thank you—I’ve even forgotten what I was going to say. Clearly, it wasn’t that important…
Martin: I’m here for whatever you need. And I’m sorry too—I might have been a bit distracted when you were talking to me.
Ana: The Lord makes all things new, and He is certainly making our marriage new. We just need to trust in Him and be attentive when the other one is struggling. Lord, give us trust in You, so that even after a night without catching anything, we may still trust and cast our nets again. Thank You, Lord!

Mother,

Thank You for your yes. Thank You for giving us Your Son and for accompanying Him all the way to the Cross. Thank You for being our Mother, for never giving up on any marriage. Blessed are You forever!

Belive It. Reflection for marriages Luke 24:35-48

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From the Gospel according to LukeLuke 24:35-48

The disciples of Jesus recounted what had taken place along the way,and how they had come to recognize him in the breaking of bread.While they were still speaking about this,he stood in their midst and said to them,”Peace be with you.”But they were startled and terrifiedand thought that they were seeing a ghost.Then he said to them, “Why are you troubled?And why do questions arise in your hearts?Look at my hands and my feet, that it is I myself.Touch me and see, because a ghost does not have flesh and bonesas you can see I have.”And as he said this,he showed them his hands and his feet.While they were still incredulous for joy and were amazed,he asked them, “Have you anything here to eat?”They gave him a piece of baked fish;he took it and ate it in front of them.He said to them,”These are my words that I spoke to you while I was still with you,that everything written about me in the law of Mosesand in the prophets and psalms must be fulfilled.”Then he opened their minds to understand the Scriptures.And he said to them,”Thus it is written that the Christ would sufferand rise from the dead on the third dayand that repentance, for the forgiveness of sins,would be preached in his nameto all the nations, beginning from Jerusalem.You are witnesses of these things

The Gospel of the Lord

Belive It.

We can never grow tired of proclaiming, celebrating, and constantly renewing what we experienced just a few days ago: Christ is risen! And we have the opportunity to encounter Him every day in the Eucharist, where we recognize Him again in the breaking of the bread, receiving His love in Holy Communion. We are nourished with the true food that satisfies, filling us with peace and renewing within us the mystery of our redemption.
Yet despite the many ways the Lord makes Himself present, we remain numb and fail to notice all the daily opportunities we have to experience the true presence of Jesus in our lives. We are witnessing Christ’s resurrection in every act of self-giving and welcome that we live out each day.
Marriage offers even more of these opportunities. Christ becomes continually present in our spouse; He speaks to us through the grace we receive in the sacrament, and He becomes real in the love we share and experience between us.

Applied to married life

Ian: Martha, I still find it hard to see how much we’ve changed, and sometimes I miss our old life.
Martha: Really? I think we’re better than ever.
Ian: Yes, I won’t argue with that. But sometimes it’s hard for me to see everything we’ve left behind after our conversion.
Martha: Don’t see it as a burden, but as a grace we’ve received.

Ian: It just feels like we gave up the things we used to enjoy—doing whatever we wanted, based on what we thought was right or wrong, as long as we weren’t hurting anyone

Martha: Maybe, but remember the emptiness it left us with, how we kept searching for more and more and nothing ever seemed enough. It even left us with a troubled conscience because deep down we knew something wasn’t right.

Ian: You’re right, Martha. I guess it’s just nostalgia—thinking about how we never used to deny ourselves anything and just did whatever we felt like, turning our backs on grace.

Martha: It happens to me too, but the good we’ve gained is so great that the feeling passes quickly

Ian: Sometimes it’s still hard for me to fully believe it, despite all the good we’ve recieved

Martha: We are witnesses to how the Lord has worked in us, and we can’t stop giving thanks for it

Ian: That’s true. Despite my clumsiness, I’m seeing more and more the grace the Lord has given us through our sacrament.

Martha: All we can do is thank the Lord for helping us believe in everything we’ve received.

Mother,

We are witnesses to all that we have received from your Son. Help us not to be afraid, but to believe in His Resurrection through the works He carries out in us. Christ is truly risen! Glory be to God.