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Recognising God. Reflection for marriages. Luke 9:7–9

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Gospel of the Day

From the Gospel according to Luke 9:7–9
Herod the tetrarch heard about all that was happening,
and he was greatly perplexed because some were saying,
“John has been raised from the dead”;
others were saying, “Elijah has appeared”;
still others, “One of the ancient prophets has arisen.”
But Herod said, “John I beheaded.
Who then is this about whom I hear such things?”
And he kept trying to see him.
Recognising God
God is far more present in our lives than we can imagine, and what happened to Herod can also happen to us: we can see that something extraordinary is taking place around us and, instead of opening our hearts, keep them closed within our own reasoning. The weight of our sin, which continues to echo within us, can prevent us from recognising what God is doing in us.
We need to ask ourselves whether we truly know Christ or whether we only know about Him from what we have heard. We should also consider whether our past, our sins, wounds and fears make it difficult for us to recognise God’s action in our lives.
Something similar can happen in marriage. Sometimes we look at our spouse through the lens of previous situations, mistakes and wounds from the past, which prevent us from discovering what God is doing in him or her and in our marriage.
Only a reconciled heart can recognise the presence of the Lord and allow itself to be transformed.
Applied to Married Life
Louis: Hi Mercedes, I’m exhausted. At work they don’t give me a moment to breathe, then I come home and it feels as though everything is against me. On top of that, I bring it all to prayer and it seems as though nothing happens. I don’t see any answer because everything stays the same. It’s as if the Lord isn’t listening.
Mercedes: Oh, Louis, you’ve come home feeling really overwhelmed. But don’t worry, you have me, and besides, the Lord does great things for you and through you.
Louis: Well, you’re saying that to reassure me, but I feel a bit abandoned.
Mercedes: Don’t say that. It may seem as though the Lord isn’t listening to you, but you know very well that He is. To me, you’re a real example of perseverance. Despite everything, you never give up prayer, and you always look for those little moments to be alone with Him.
Louis: The truth is, I need it. I can’t stop seeking that intimacy with God. But when it seems pointless, as though there’s no answer, I feel like throwing in the towel and simply leaving everything to Providence.
Mercedes: You know very well that doesn’t work. Remember what we were like before we knew the Lord. We wanted to control everything and do everything through our own strength, and you know where that leads. Remember that back then we really did come close to throwing everything away, but He came to rescue us, entering into our lives and changing everything.
Louis: That’s true. Without God, we came close to separating, and when we allowed Him into our lives, He changed everything for the better.
Mercedes: That’s why you can’t allow yourself to think that it’s all pointless. Perhaps you’re so focused on your own concerns that you’re not allowing Him into your heart. With all the noise created by everything happening around you, perhaps you’re paying more attention to yourself than to the Lord. It happens to me sometimes too.
Louis: You’re right. It’s not so much that I’m receiving nothing; it’s that I’m no longer listening to Him. Thank you for the light you bring me, and above all, I thank God for speaking to me through you, just as He has done now. I am truly blessed.
Mercedes: Glory to God!
Mother,
Help us to have humble hearts, capable of recognising God in our marriage and allowing ourselves to be converted by His presence.

The Only Bag We Need. Reflection for marriages. Luke 9:1–6

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Holy Gospel according to Saint Luke 9:1–6

Jesus summoned the Twelve and gave them power and authority over all demons and to cure diseases, and he sent them to proclaim the Kingdom of God and to heal the sick.
He said to them, “Take nothing for the journey, neither walking stick, nor sack, nor food, nor money, and let no one take a second tunic.
Whatever house you enter, stay there and leave from there.
And as for those who do not welcome you, when you leave that town, shake the dust from your feet in testimony against them.”
Then they set out and went from village to village proclaiming the good news and curing diseases everywhere.
The Only Bag We Need
Jesus calls the Twelve together and sends them out to proclaim the Kingdom of God. We too are called and sent. As married couples, we have a beautiful way of evangelising: by showing the beauty of our vocation and making God’s Love visible.
When a married couple remains united to the Lord through the Sacrament, their human love is gradually transformed into a divine love, becoming a mirror in which the world can look and discover how God loves. That visible love is the only bag we need. Our true strength lies not in what we carry in our hands, but in our union.
How beautiful it is to be able to evangelise together, showing our love and bearing witness to the work God is doing in our marriage!
What is it about marriage that enables it to represent God’s love here on earth? What a great mystery! What greatness!
Today, during this little time of prayer, I ask myself: Can someone encounter Christ by looking at our marriage?
Lord, make us a living sign of Your love.
Applied to Married Life
Christine: Were those Anne and Louis sitting at the table next to us?
Oscar: Yes. We hadn’t seen them for such a long time.
Christine: But they seem like completely different people… They were on the verge of separating. They used to say there was no hope for their marriage…
Oscar: Well, look at the change in them. I wouldn’t have given them a chance. I was surprised because she even said to me, “Now we thank God even for that difficult time.”
Christine: For that difficult time?
Oscar: Yes. She told me that it was precisely then that they discovered they couldn’t do it on their own, and they began to let God into their marriage.
Christine: Well… I don’t know exactly what God has done with them, but you can tell He has done something… and something very beautiful!
Oscar: What do you think about giving them a call and arranging to meet up another day, so they can tell us about it?
Christine: Yes. Something has stirred in me too… Perhaps we also need to make a little more room for the Lord.
Mother,
How beautiful it is to have you in our marriage too. Blessed are you!

Do You Say You Love God?Reflection for marriages. Luke 8:19–21

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Gospel of the Day

From the Gospel according to Luke 8:19–21
The mother of Jesus and his brothers came to him
but were unable to join him because of the crowd.
He was told, “Your mother and your brothers are standing outside
and they wish to see you.”
He said to them in reply, “My mother and my brothers
are those who hear the word of God and act on it.”
Do You Say You Love God?
Jesus reveals where Mary’s true greatness lies and the source of the communion between them: Mary is the one who listened to the Word of God and lived according to it. The fruit of this is communion and intimacy with Him. Jesus invites all of us to become intimate with Him by living according to His Word.
What kind of love do we have for God if we listen to His Word but do not want to embody it in our lives? Let us examine our hearts and ask ourselves whether I act according to the will of God or react from my wounded heart.
We must be very attentive: we may pray together as a married couple, help at retreats and go to the Eucharist, yet still not allow the “Word” to become incarnate in us as the Word became incarnate in Mary. To love God is to do His will, even when it does not coincide with our own.
Applied to Married Life
Laura is going through a marital crisis that requires a process of healing, patience and forgiveness. She has called her mentor and told him that she no longer wants to continue.
Laura: I’m tired. Tired of forgiving, of giving in, of always being the one who loves… I don’t want to carry on anymore.
Edward: And what do you want to do?
Laura: Think about myself. Let him change. I’ve already done enough; now it’s my turn to be happy.
Edward: That isn’t the way, Laura. Not if you want to follow Christ.
Laura: I want to follow Christ, yes, but not my husband.
Edward: To love God is to do His will. “Whoever loves me will keep my word.” Do you remember these words from the Gospel? Don’t allow yourself to be deceived by the devil. What you are doing is standing before God and saying: “I don’t want to do Your will. I don’t believe Your way will lead me to happiness, so I’m going to do things my way, not Yours.” Do you see?
Laura remains silent.
Edward: This is the moment to do God’s will, even when it is contrary to your own. We know that our will, distorted by sin, leads us to death, while His will leads us to life.
Laura: But I can’t take any more.
Edward: I already told you that, when the time came, we would carry you in our arms, on a stretcher, however necessary — and that is what we will do. Will you let us?
Laura smiles.
Laura: How could I say no to God?
Mother,
Give us your obedience to the Word of God and your humility, and we will be blessed with you.
Praise be to the Lord!

Matthew or Pharisee? Reflection for marriages. Matthew 9:9–13

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Gospel of the Day

A reading from the Holy Gospel according to Matthew 9:9–13
As Jesus passed by, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the customs post. He said to him,
“Follow me.”
And he got up and followed him.
While he was at table in his house, many tax collectors and sinners came and sat with Jesus and his disciples.
The Pharisees saw this and said to his disciples,
“Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?”
He heard this and said,
“Those who are well do not need a physician, but the sick do. Go and learn the meaning of the words,
‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’
I did not come to call the righteous but sinners.”

Matthew or Pharisee?
In our marriage, we often fall into the attitude of the Pharisee: we place ourselves in the position of judging our spouse, and even judging the way Jesus is working in their life. We allow ourselves to be carried away by spiritual pride and begin to measure the life of faith in terms of “merit” or moral accounting. We think ourselves more worthy of the Lord drawing near to us because we consider ourselves holier, because we make more sacrifices, or because we are more involved in the parish. Yet this attitude of self-sufficiency actually distances us from Him, because where there is judgement, there is no room for mercy.
Jesus completely overturns this logic of merit. He does not seek those who believe themselves to be “righteous”, but contrite and humbled hearts that recognise their need for healing. This is why He did not call Matthew because of what he was at that moment — a tax collector regarded as a public sinner — but because of what he could become through His grace. If, instead of judging our spouse for their shortcomings, we adopt that same gaze of hope, we transform our married life into a place of redemption.
Whenever we are tempted to consider ourselves “the good one” in the marriage, let us remember how far we ourselves still are from the true mercy of God, and that being seated at His table is an undeserved gift that we receive only through His grace. Marriage does not need two perfect people, but two forgiven sinners who help one another towards holiness.
Let us rejoice sincerely and celebrate whenever our spouse receives even the smallest grace from Jesus — a little step forward, a gesture, a caress from Him — recognising in it the freely given love of God.

Applied to Married Life
Laura: John, are you angry with me?
John: No… Well, a little, but more with myself. Lately I’ve been unsettled inside. I’ve been thinking a lot about how I’m the one keeping everything going: things at the parish, praying together, keeping an eye on the children’s faith… while it all seems very comfortable for you.
Laura: Yes… I know you’re very committed.
John: And sometimes I think that, I don’t know… that I’m better than you because I do all those things.
Laura: Do you really think that?
John: I’m a little ashamed to admit it, but yes. I suppose I’ve fallen into thinking that I’m the “good one” out of the two of us and judging you.
Laura: John, I need you to be my husband and to stand beside me, not ahead of me.
John: Yes… You’re right.
Laura: I know I’m not where you are at the moment, but I also know that Jesus is working in me and walking with me.
John: That’s what I find difficult. Instead of trusting in what Jesus wants to do in you, I focus on what you’re lacking.
Laura: And I also have to admit that when I feel you’re judging me, I close myself off.
John: Forgive me. I want to learn to rejoice whenever I see even the smallest step you take, even when it’s different from what I expected.
Laura: And I want to allow you to help me more too.
John: In the end, neither of us has earned the right to be closer to Jesus.
Laura: No. It is He who has invited us, through His mercy.
John: And how patient He is with us…
Laura: Thank goodness.

Mother,
May I always recognise myself as someone in need of the healing of my wounded heart.
Praise be to God!

The Same Wage. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 20:1-16

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From the Gospel according to Matthew 20:1-16
Jesus told his disciples this parable: “The kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out at dawn to hire laborers for his vineyard.  After agreeing with them for the usual daily wage, he sent them into his vineyard.  Going out about nine o’clock, the landowner saw others standing idle in the marketplace, and he said to them, ‘You too go into my vineyard, and I will give you what is just.’ So they went off.  And he went out again around noon, and around three o’clock, and did likewise.  Going out about five o’clock,
the landowner found others standing around, and said to them, ‘Why do you stand here idle all day?’ They answered, ‘Because no one has hired us.’ He said to them, ‘You too go into my vineyard.’ When it was evening the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman, ‘Summon the laborers and give them their pay, beginning with the last and ending with the first.’ When those who had started about five o’clock came, each received the usual daily wage.  So when the first came, they thought that they would receive more, but each of them also got the usual wage.  And on receiving it they grumbled against the landowner, saying, ‘These last ones worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us, who bore the day’s burden and the heat.’ He said to one of them in reply, ‘My friend, I am not cheating you.  Did you not agree with me for the usual daily wage?  Take what is yours and go.  What if I wish to give this last one the same as you?  Or am I not free to do as I wish with my own money?  Are you envious because I am generous?’ Thus, the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

The Same Wage
Today the Lord shows us that He is always going out to seek us. He wants us to know Him and to work for Him. The hour does not matter, dear husbands and wives; He calls us to live our marriage as He intended it to be, and He does not care what time we discovered this calling. He simply invites us to live it.Some He calls at the first hour, in their youth; others in the middle of the day, when they have already travelled part of the journey; others in the afternoon, in their maturity; and still others at the very end, in their final years. The hour of the calling does not matter. He sends us out to work for Him: to be witnesses to His love alive in us, and to proclaim it. The reward will be the same, if we remain faithful: Eternal Life. Let us not be afraid to answer His call, to work with Him and for Him, and to help Him build His Kingdom in this world. Take courage! Proclaim the wonders He has worked in your hearts as husband and wife.

Applied to Married Life
Mary: Oh, Lewis, if only we had known all this they have taught us before… Now, with our life already settled…
Lewis: Mary, the Lord has shown us His goodness now. It may seem late to us, and we may think He could have done it sooner, but He has chosen it this way. Besides, we have lived a beautiful life alongside Him, even if we had not known about the wonderful thing they have shown us now.
Mary: Yes, but if we had known about this path earlier, perhaps we could have avoided some suffering.
Lewis: But then His will would not have been fulfilled.
Mary: Yes, but we have so little time left to live it. We’re very old.
Lewis: Well, then what we have to do is live it to the fullest and show it to our children, and even to our grandchildren some of whom already have girlfriends so that they can live it from the very beginning.
Mary: You’re right, Lewis.
Lewis: Besides, afterwards we’ll have all of eternal life to enjoy it. Just think how much time we’ll have! Hahaha. The Lord pays us the same wage!

Mother,
What wonders You allow us to discover when You lead us to Your Son. Never let us drift away from Him. Blessed and praised be He forever!