Receiving everything. Reflection for married couples. Matthew 11:25-27

GOSPEL OF THE DAY

From the Gospel according to Matthew 11:25-27

At that time Jesus exclaimed:

“I give praise to you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth,

for although you have hidden these things

from the wise and the learned

you have revealed them to the childlike.

Yes, Father, such has been your gracious will.

All things have been handed over to me by my Father.

No one knows the Son except the Father,

and no one knows the Father except the Son

and anyone to whom the Son wishes to reveal him.”

The word of the Lord

 

Receiving everything

What do the little ones have that the wise do not? Jesus shows us two attitudes of the heart. The little ones are easily amazed; they ask questions, they trust, they recognise that they do not know, they allow themselves to be taught, and with simplicity they receive everything from their parents. We are all born with a child’s heart, but the pride inherited from original sin gradually makes us self‑sufficient. It is the same temptation from Genesis: “You will be like gods” (Gen 3:5). And so the “wise and learned” begin to appear: I stop asking, I stop seeking help, I stop listening, I refuse correction… I am so full of myself and my certainties that I no longer need to receive anything. And when I stop receiving, I stop being small.

The “wise and learned” in marriage think: “I already know what you’re like,” “You always do the same,” “You’re never going to change,” “I know you inside out.” Meanwhile, the little one thinks: “Lord, help me,” “I need your grace,” “I need my spouse,” “I need to learn how to love.” The more full we are of ourselves, the less room the Lord finds to reveal the secrets of his Heart. That is why today Jesus gives thanks to the Father, because he still finds little souls — those who, when they do not understand, continue to trust. That trust is the doorway through which the Father reveals his secrets. And the Father’s secrets are not conquered; they are received with a child’s heart.

Is my heart one of these?

Applied to married couples

James and Carmen had planned to go out for dinner together after an exhausting week. But at the last minute the washing machine breaks, the kitchen floods, and one of the children starts running a fever. The perfect plan collapses.

James: (mopping up water, visibly frustrated) What a disaster! And I was so looking forward to tonight…

Carmen: Love, look at me for a moment. My controlling side is protesting on the inside too, but I’d like to say what Jesus said: “Yes, Father, for this is what you have willed.”

James: You can really say that right now?

Carmen: It doesn’t come naturally. It comes from faith. I would also have chosen a different kind of evening, but the Father has allowed this one. And if He has allowed it, it must be because He wants to give us something here too.

James: My plan was to have dinner in a restaurant.

Carmen: And God’s plan seems to be caring for our child and bailing out water together.

(James smiles for the first time all evening.)

James: Well then, let’s order a pizza and finish clearing this up.

Carmen: Yes, Father, for this is what you have willed.

 

Mother,

Grant me a small heart that does not need to understand everything, and teach me each day to discover the Father’s hidden gifts. Blessed and praised are you!

Every gift demands a task. Reflection for married couples. Matthew 11:20-24

GOSPEL OF THE DAY

From the Gospel according to Matthew 11:20-24

Then he began to reproach the towns where most

of his mighty deeds had been done,

since they had not repented.

“Woe to you, Chorazin! Woe to you, Bethsaida!

For if the mighty deeds done

in your midst had been done in Tyre and Sidon,

they would long ago have repented in sackcloth and ashes.

But I tell you, it will be more tolerable for Tyre and Sidon

on the day of judgment than for you.

And as for you, Capernaum:

‘Will you be exalted to heaven?

You will go down to the netherworld.’

For if the mighty deeds done in your midst

had been done in Sodom,

it would have remained until this day.

But I tell you, it will be more tolerable

for the land of Sodom on the day

of judgment than for you.”

The word of the Lord

Every gift demands a task

Jesus speaks firmly to the cities where he had devoted more time, more effort, and more miracles — and yet they had not chosen to turn their lives towards the light of Jesus Christ. The same can happen in our marriage: Christ reveals to us the truth of marriage, and he reveals his merciful and perfect love through the Eucharist. He insists, again and again, with his renewing message of welcome and self‑gift, especially through the catechesis of Saint John Paul II — and yet many hearts remain hardened, despite the effort the Lord makes to show us the Truth.

With this, he tells us that the judgement will be more severe for those who have received more light than for those who do not know him. Therefore, the gift we are receiving must lead us to the task of change: purifying our heart, and then giving freely what we have freely received, wherever our Mother leads us.

Applied to married life

William: Felicity, every time we help out on a Proyecto Amor Conyugal retreat, we realise that we’re loving each other with a mediocre kind of love, while witnessing true miracles in the marriages that have been chosen. And we ourselves aren’t moving forward; we’re not taking that firm decision to love in all our actions.

Felicity: William, this is the fourth time the little shepherds in the group have encouraged us to prepare the catechesis, and we keep saying no. Everyone says that preparing it — even though it unsettles them — ends up bringing them closer together because it leads them to live it.

William: And Felicity, we do our conjugal prayer on some days when things are going well, but on many other days we don’t.

Felicity: That’s true. When we do it properly, it helps me to know you better and to think well of you. I believe the Lord is making a real effort to give us the means — even miracles — so that we can walk this path faithfully, with will and humility. And yet we choose to remain lukewarm, anchored in pride and arrogance.

William: I love you very much, Felicity, and it hurts me to wound you — and to wound the Lord as well. I’m going to call the little shepherds and tell them that we’ll prepare the next catechesis, and we’re going to pray together. I ask you to help me persevere every day.

Felicity: How deeply your words move me. Thank you, my God, for this husband you have given me.

Mother,

Thank you for never ceasing to tell us, “Do whatever He tells you,” so that we may be made new, like the wine at the wedding feast of Cana.

Blessed and praised be the Lord.

A struggle that saves. Reflection for married couples. Matthew 10:34-42

GOSPEL OF THE DAY

From the Gospel according to Matthew 10:34

Jesus said to his Apostles:

“Do not think that I have come to bring peace upon the earth.

I have come to bring not peace but the sword.

For I have come to set

a man against his father,

a daughter against her mother,

and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law;

and one’s enemies will be those of his household. “Whoever loves

father or mother more than me is not worthy of me,

and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me;

and whoever does not take up his cross

and follow after me is not worthy of me.

Whoever finds his life will lose it,

and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

“Whoever receives you receives me,

and whoever receives me receives the one who sent me.

Whoever receives a prophet because he is a prophet

will receive a prophet’s reward,

and whoever receives a righteous man

because he is righteous

will receive a righteous man’s reward.

And whoever gives only a cup of cold water

to one of these little ones to drink

because he is a disciple–

amen, I say to you, he will surely not lose his reward. “When Jesus

finished giving these commands to his Twelve disciples,

he went away from that place to teach and to preach in their towns.

The word of the Lord

 

A struggle that saves

In our marital vocation, Jesus encourages us to let go of what we often believe is “our life”, so that we may receive the life he has prepared for us. We cannot hold on to everything. So often we try to satisfy every expectation from our family of origin, maintain social appearances, pursue professional success — and in the end we have no strength left for our spouse, for tending our intimacy, for the peace of our home, for conjugal prayer, for being attentive in serving one another.

The order needs to change: first God, then communion with my spouse, and afterwards everything else. And very often this reordering brings struggle — yet it is precisely this struggle that draws us closer to living the Kingdom of God in our daily life.

 

Applied to married life

Laura: Peter, I’m trying, but the rejection from your family causes me real suffering. I thought that when we married I would find the mother I never had, but instead I’ve found myself in a situation that is consuming me — and your attitude even more so. 

Peter: Laura, you’re right, and I ask your forgiveness. I’ve spent a long time trying not to take a stand because it feels so harsh to bring the truth into this situation. I’m afraid of losing them, especially because of my sister’s temperament. But this is affecting our union; it’s undermining our covenant, because I should be protecting you, and instead I choose not to upset my family.

Laura: I don’t want you to lose your family. I’m sure the Lord will help me carry this burden.

Peter: I don’t want to lose them either, but I have to bring truth into this situation. I will speak with them as many times as necessary, with all the love I can. It will be hard, but I’m not going to risk our union just to avoid this bitter moment. We will face this battle together, united in the heart of Christ.

It was difficult for Peter, but with much prayer, love, and time, his family eventually came to admire the communion lived in their son’s marriage — the source of his happiness, and theirs.

 

Mother,

May I never be afraid to challenge anything that pulls me away from my vocation as a husband. Blessed be God!

Always Choose Christ. Reflection for married couples. Matthew 19:27-29

‘You who have followed me will receive a hundredfold.’
Gospel according to Matthew 19:27-29

At that time: Peter said to Jesus, ‘See, we have left everything and followed you. What, then, will we have?’ Jesus said to them, ‘Truly, I say to you, in the new world, when the Son of Man will sit on his glorious throne, you who have followed me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. And everyone who has left houses, or brothers or sisters, or father or mother, or children or lands for my name’s sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life.’

The Gospel of the Lord

Always Choose Christ

Today, we ask the Lord the same question that Peter asked: “We have left everything… what then will we receive?” And Jesus reveals one of the secrets of the Kingdom: whoever leaves everything for His sake, in reality loses nothing but finds Everything. In our married life, what is it that prevents us from living the Kingdom of God among us? Our attachments—anything that occupies the place where Christ longs to reign. Attachment to my own will, my sense of security, my plans, my self-image, my wounds or my fears can close my heart to the gift that God wants to make of our marriage. Without even realising it, we can prevent the Bridegroom from dwelling fully among us. Today the Lord gently asks us: What am I holding on to that prevents Christ from reigning fully in our marriage? What attachment is stopping me from loving my spouse? When we dare to place that attachment into the Lord’s hands, our hearts are enlarged so that we can love more deeply. Then we discover that the “hundredfold” Jesus promises begins even now: in a deeper communion with Him, in a freer self-giving between husband and wife, and in a marriage that becomes a foretaste of the Kingdom and a sure path towards eternal life.

Applied to Married Life:

Christopher: Margaret, while praying with today’s Gospel, the Lord gave me a great deal of light. I’ve realised that lately we’ve become so focused on the grandchildren. We talk about them all the time, and whenever they call, we drop everything and rush straight to them.
Margaret: Christopher, they’re our grandchildren. How could we possibly say no?
Christopher: I’m not saying we shouldn’t help them, but it’s been weeks since we’ve had any time for ourselves—to talk, or to pray together.
Margaret: Christopher, are you saying that the grandchildren are drawing us away from God?
Christopher: No. I’m saying that our attachment to them may be drawing us away from our communion as husband and wife.
Margaret: Christopher, do you know what? You’re right. Because we’re afraid of letting them down, we’ve been neglecting what God entrusted to us—our first vocation, which is our marriage.
Christopher: Margaret, if we take care of our communion, we’ll become better grandparents too. Loving them doesn’t mean always being available.
Christopher: So, what do you think about setting aside one afternoon this week just for us—to talk peacefully, put our priorities back in the right order, and pray together?
Margaret: Yes. And if they call us, we’ll discern together whether we’re able to help or whether it’s time to say no, peacefully.

Mother,

teach us to place Christ at the centre of our marriage and to love with freedom, without attachments that draw us away from Him. Blessed and praised be the Lord.

Lamb or Wolf? Reflection for married couples. Matthew 10:16-23

‘It is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father.’
Gospel according to Matthew 10:1623

At that time: Jesus instructed his Apostles: ‘Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves. Beware of men, for they will deliver you over to councils and flog you in their synagogues, and you will be dragged before governors and kings for my sake, to bear witness before them and the Gentiles. When they deliver you over, do not be anxious how you are to speak or what you are to say, for what you are to say will be given to you in that hour. For it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you. Brother will deliver brother over to death, and the father his child, and children will rise against parents and have them put to death, and you will be hated by all for my name’s sake. But the one who endures to the end will be saved. When they persecute you in one town, flee to the next, for truly, I say to you, you will not have gone through all the towns of Israel before the Son of Man comes.’

The Gospel of the Lord

Lamb or Wolf?

Today the Lord gives us a warning, and the question we must ask ourselves is… Am I a lamb or a wolf in my marriage?
If I stay close to God and the Lord is my Shepherd, then I will listen to my spouse, I will be open to what they say, I will sow peace in our home and, ultimately, I will know the joy of loving and being loved, like a lamb with its shepherd.
If, however, I drift away from the Lord, my heart becomes increasingly selfish, arrogant and proud. I will want to be right, I will sow discord in our home and, in the end, I will become a wolf.
And you, what do you want to be—a wolf or a lamb?

Applied to Married Life:

Amelia: I thought I had everything under control… But then our arguments began, after that we both lost our jobs, and then came the financial difficulties…
Jonathan: Yes, Amy, I remember. And on top of that, we tried to solve our problems in a thousand different ways. We even tried every kind of therapy to save our marriage…
Amelia: Yes, and all those solutions only fed my pride, and I was still angry. Then the problems kept coming: our son was struggling at school…
Jonathan: And I became more and more sad and depressed. Our home was filled with nothing but shouting and silence, with each of us living our own separate life.
Amelia: Until my friend Catherine invited us to a Marriage in Love Project retreat. It was there that we realised the real cause of our bad temper, our anger and our crises: we had not allowed God to be with us or at the centre of our marriage…
Jonathan: That’s right. We had been building our marriage, our family and everything around us according to our own ideas.
Amelia: And what joy! What hope we found when we began to let the Lord work within us!
Jonathan: Yes, we started going to the catecheses and Eucharistic Adoration together… And everything gradually began to fall into place, didn’t it?n
Amelia: Now all I can do is thank God for everything—even for the difficulties He allowed, because they helped us to see that without Him there is darkness and sadness, but with Him everything changes!

Mother,
Help us to be lambs, united to Your Son. Praised be the Lord.