Not without you. Reflection for married couples. Matthew 10:34-11:1

GOSPEL

‘I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.’
Matthew 10:34-11:1

At that time: Jesus instructed his Apostles: ‘Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
  ‘Whoever receives you, receives me, and whoever receives me, receives him who sent me. The one who receives a prophet because he is a prophet will receive a prophet’s reward, and the one who receives a righteous person because he is a righteous person will receive a righteous person’s reward. And whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water because he is a disciple, truly, I say to you, he will by no means lose his reward.’
  When Jesus had finished instructing his twelve disciples, he went on from there to teach and preach in their cities.
The Gospel of the Lord

Not Without You

In our daily lives, we often find ourselves concerned with our relationships—with our parents, wondering if we’re doing enough for our in-laws, if we’re truly looking after them. We think about our siblings and how wonderful it would be if they discovered the journey of faith we’re on…
But where is the Lord in all of this? And where are we? Do I truly know myself as a child of God and act accordingly? Do my spouse and I live as children of the Father?
Today, Lord, You remind us that above all else—and before dealing with anyone—we must begin with Love. That means living as Your children. As spouses, let us come before You together, as children of God the Father. You have promised to pour out Your grace upon us through our sacrament.
So, if I struggle to love, let me love with Your love. If I long to persuade someone, let me ask the Father in Your name. If I am hurt by how others treat me, let me offer it up to the Father as You did.
Before going anywhere ourselves, may we go in Your name, with You, and through You.
Through Christ, with Him, and in Him, to You, almighty Father, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, all honour and glory, for ever and ever. Amen.

Applied to Married Life:

Frank: I keep wondering if I’m loving my mum enough.
Angela: Why do you say that?
Frank: I don’t know if I’ve been visiting her as often as I should. It’s been a while since we saw her.
Angela: I think we visit her enough—if we don’t make time for us and our home, then when do we?
And just like that, Angela and Frank realised they were both acting on their own personal criteria. So they decided to take it to prayer.
The next day, after having prayed about it, they each decided to focus more on the other than on themselves…
Angela: Shall we go see your mum this Sunday? I know I need to love her, even when it’s hard for me.
Frank: Thank you so much, love. I know it’s not easy for you, and I really appreciate it. How about we have lunch with her, and come home a bit early so we can still go for a walk together—just the two of us? How does that sound?
Angela: Oh, that sounds perfect!
Both together: Thank You, Lord, for revealing Your will when we place things in Your hands.

Mother,

Thank You for showing us the way, for reminding us we are Your little children, always in need of the Father’s love.
Praised be the Lord!

Loving You in My Husband. Reflection for marriages. Luke 10:25-37

From the Gospel according to Luke. Lk 10:25-37

There was a scholar of the law who stood up to test Jesus and said,”Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” Jesus said to him, “What is written in the law? How do you read it?” He said in reply, “You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your being, with all your strength, and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.” He replied to him, “You have answered correctly; do this and you will live.”
But because he wished to justify himself, he said to Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?” Jesus replied, “A man fell victim to robbers as he went down from Jerusalem to Jericho. They stripped and beat him and went off leaving him half-dead. A priest happened to be going down that road, but when he saw him, he passed by on the opposite side. Likewise a Levite came to the place, and when he saw him, he passed by on the opposite side. But a Samaritan traveler who came upon him was moved with compassion at the sight. He approached the victim, poured oil and wine over his wounds and bandaged them. Then he lifted him up on his own animal, took him to an inn, and cared for him. The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper with the instruction, ‘Take care of him. If you spend more than what I have given you, I shall repay you on my way back.’
Which of these three, in your opinion, was neighbor to the robbers’ victim?” He answered, “The one who treated him with mercy.” Jesus said to him, “Go and do likewise.”

The Gospel of the Lord

Loving You in My Husband

Today, Lord, You show me how I must give myself, how I must love. To love You above all things with all my being, and my neighbor as myself.
And who is more myself than my own flesh? My husband. Through our sacrament of marriage, we are no longer two, but one flesh.
And in that flesh, I must love You by loving my spouse. Loving him always and above all else, in every circumstance, and especially when he is blinded by sin or wounded. When he least deserves it, he needs me the most.
I know this is impossible for me, but not if I live by the grace of the Sacrament of Matrimony: for You, with You, and in You, because with You, all things are possible.
Thank You, Lord, for the grace You grant us through our sacrament. Praised be Your name.

Applied to married life:

Tessa: (in prayer) Lord, You know that I give myself to others through various church activities, but today I feel You are asking more of me. That You want me to love first and foremost in my domestic church, that I give myself to my husband as You give Yourself to Your bride, the Church.
I ask You, Lord, for Your grace, because many times it is difficult for me. Because I don’t see my husband as my neighbor, but as a rival, an enemy I must defend myself against. Cleanse my vision, Lord, and give me Your grace through my Sacrament. Amen.

Mother,

Thank you for showing us the path of conjugal charity. Blessed are you forever. Amen.

Do I Have Fears? Reflection for marriages. Mt 10:24-33

From the Gospels according to Matthew. Mt 10:24-33

Jesus said to his Apostles: “No disciple is above his teacher, no slave above his master. It is enough for the disciple that he become like his teacher, for the slave that he become like his master. If they have called the master of the house Beelzebul, how much more those of his household!
“Therefore do not be afraid of them. Nothing is concealed that will not be revealed, nor secret that will not be known. What I say to you in the darkness, speak in the light; what you hear whispered, proclaim on the housetops. And do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul; rather, be afraid of the one who can destroy both soul and body in Gehenna. Are not two sparrows sold for a small coin? Yet not one of them falls to the ground without your Father’s knowledge. Even all the hairs of your head are counted. So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. Everyone who acknowledges me before others I will acknowledge before my heavenly Father. But whoever denies me before others,
I will deny before my heavenly Father.” 

The Gospel of the Lord

 

Do I Have Fears?

Lord, you urge us not to be afraid, telling us that “even the hairs on our head are numbered.” That means You know everything, You know what we’re going through, and if You allow it, it’s because You will bring a greater good from it if we place it in Your Hands.
You only tell us to fear one thing: “fear the one who can destroy both soul and body in Gehenna,” meaning that we should only fear being led by the evil one who wants us not to do Your Will, to distrust You, and to fall into despair.
So, Lord, we place everything in Your Hands. We only want to do Your Will. To act in a way that pleases You, to act as You would. 

Applied to Married Life:

Simon: Anna, I can’t take it anymore! I’m fed up, I’m suffering so much because of our son Carl. I can’t go on like this, he’s going to hear it from me. And if you defend him, you’ll see!

Anna: Simon, please. I understand your anger, but before saying anything, please pray about it, put it in the Lord’s Hands.

Simon: Years ago, I would have told you to get lost, but after what I’ve been learning and experiencing in Marital Love Project, I’ll listen to you.

(After praying and placing it in the Lord’s Hands)

Simon: Anna, I’m suffering a lot with Carl. I feel like I’m losing him. I don’t know what to do. But at the foot of the Cross, I realized that our son is a child of God, that He knows more than we do, and that He must have a reason for allowing this… So tomorrow I’m going to talk to Carl to see what’s going on with him, so he feels heard, loved, and, most of all, so he trusts in God, who is his Father and loves him madly. I’ll tell him that if he wants, I can take him to Confession and we can go to Mass together. If he listens, great. And if he doesn’t, I’ll pray even more for him and continue giving my life for our family. Every day, I want to give myself more for Christ, with Christ, in Christ.

Anna: How wonderful to hear you, Simon! I’m going to talk to our other children so they can pray for their brother and offer sacrifices for him. With all our prayers and sacrifices, the Lord will act. We don’t know when, but He will. I trust completely in Christ. He gave His life for us, He is so good!

 

Mother,
Help us always to listen to your Son and bring our petitions to His feet. With you, we have nothing to fear. Thank you so much for everything. Praise be to the Lord.

A Hundredfold. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 19,27-29

From the Gospel according to Matthew. Mt 19, 27-29.

Peter answered him, “We have left everything to follow you! What then will there be for us?”
Jesus said to them, “Truly I tell you, at the renewal of all things, when the Son of Man sits on his glorious throne, you who have followed me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life”.
 
The Gospel of the Lord

 
A Hundredfold

The Lord always gives us back a hundredfold.
In our lives, our priority must be Him and only Him. It’s true that we have “state obligations,” and by fulfilling them we also serve God. But sometimes the devil tempts us by making us place more importance on earthly things than on divine ones.
In the Gospel, Christ speaks to us about receiving a hundred times more, but we ask ourselves: when we give ourselves to the Lord, do we do it for the reward or out of love? We must give ourselves out of love, expecting nothing in return, because the very act of giving ourselves is already more than a gift (“It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Acts 20, 35).  Our self-giving should be without measure, as many saints have said throughout history: we must give until it hurts.

Applied to Married Life:

Maria: Honey, could you help me prepare dinner tonight? My afternoon got complicated with work, and I don’t know if I’ll have time.
Karsten: Well… okay, but if I help you today, would you come with me Tuesday night to that dinner with my friends we’ve been postponing?
Maria: Seriously? It’s just that your friends tell some crude jokes, sometimes they go too far, and I feel a bit uncomfortable… That’s why I don’t enjoy those dinners.
Karsten: You’re right, love. Since we’ve been drawing closer to the Lord, those dinners have been hard for me too. People laugh at everything, but in a mean-spirited way… Also, I ask your forgiveness, because I shouldn’t love you with conditions. I’ll roll up my sleeves right now and make a delicious dinner.
Maria: That’s wonderful! You don’t know how much I appreciate it. I just had an idea, what if we change the plan, see what you think… We tell your friends to meet us at the Adoration chapel first on Tuesday, and then we go to dinner. That way, we can start bringing them closer to the Lord.
Karsten: I think that’s a fantastic idea! That way, Jesus will begin transforming their hearts.

Mother,

Help us give ourselves without limits, without conditions, until it hurts.  Glory and praise to the Lord who makes all things possible.

Peace at Home. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 10:7-15

Gospel

From the Gospel according to Matthew. Mt. 10:7-15
Jesus said to his Apostles: “As you go, make this proclamation: ‘The Kingdom of heaven is at hand.’ Cure the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, drive out demons. Without cost you have received; without cost you are to give. Do not take gold or silver or copper for your belts; no sack for the journey, or a second tunic, or sandals, or walking stick. The laborer deserves his keep. Whatever town or village you enter, look for a worthy person in it, and stay there until you leave. As you enter a house, wish it peace. If the house is worthy, let your peace come upon it; if not, let your peace return to you. Whoever will not receive you or listen to your words go outside that house or town and shake the dust from your feet. Amen, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for the land of Sodom and Gomorrah on the day of judgment than for that town.”

The Gospel of the Lord.

Peace at Home

In married life, this “being sent” can be understood as the mission we have to bring the Kingdom of God into our home, into our marriage.
We often wait for the other person to change, but we need to be clear: that’s not what Jesus asks of us as husbands or wives. He wants each of us, regardless of how the other is acting, to announce through our actions that the Kingdom is near. He is present and active in the midst of human love, and it’s up to us to show that, first and foremost to our spouse, and then to others.
Do we show that the Kingdom of God is near in the way we look at each other, treat each other, or speak about our spouse,?
Our home is that “house” that can either welcome God’s peace or reject it. Let’s welcome His grace, so that the peace we long for is always present in our marriage.

 
Applied to Married Life:

Sharon: Andy, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the kind of example we give to others. Do you think people can feel the “fragrance of Christ” when they’re around us?
Andy: Honestly? Maybe not. I care too much about what people think, and I’m not really living out the kind of testimony Christ is asking from me.
Sharon: Do you think we act differently in front of God than we do in front of other people? Aren’t we supposed to be an authentic couple that always lives with God in mind?
Andy: Well… now that you mention it and I stop to think about it, I guess I’m not really living that way. I worry too much about appearances. I’m sure I could do a lot better.
Sharon: Hey, don’t be too hard on yourself. You’ve told everyone you’re doing Confirmation classes, and you’ve shared with a bunch of people that we’re part of Proyecto Amor Conyugal.
Andy: That’s true. Maybe I’m not that bad. [laughs]
Sharon: Andy, you’re not bad at all, and definitely not in God’s eyes. But it’s good that we reflect on these things often. So we don’t forget where we are, where God wants us to be, and what He wants from us, don’t you think?
Andy: Absolutely. Thanks for reminding me, and for reminding me, too, that I’ve already changed for the better by God’s grace. More and more, I’m seeing clearly that you’re exactly what I need to help me get to heaven. Thank you, love.

Mother,

Help me to follow your example of detachment from worldly things, carrying neither silver nor gold, nor extra tunic or sandals, so I can fulfill God’s will. May He be praised forever.