The Path of Marriage. Reflection for marriages: Matthew 6:7-15

From the Gospel according to Matthew
6:7-15

Jesus said to his disciples:
“In praying, do not babble like the pagans,
who think that they will be heard because of their many words.
Do not be like them.
Your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

“This is how you are to pray:

‘Our Father who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name,
thy Kingdom come,
thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread;
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us;
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.’

“If you forgive others their transgressions,
your heavenly Father will forgive you.
But if you do not forgive others,
neither will your Father forgive your transgressions.”

The Path of Marriage

It is the prayer that Christ left to His bride, the Church, and thus it encompasses everything about marriage. It teaches us to recognize that God is the center of our marital and family life. It also teaches us to seek His will and not our own. It teaches us to ask for and give nourishment every day, especially the nourishment of the soul to give love. It also teaches us to ask for forgiveness and forgive one another between spouses. And it teaches us to strive together so that we do not fall into temptations that break our communion.

Applied to Married Life:

Estela: Edwin, how could your mother say in front of everyone yesterday that I don’t bring anything when she invites us to eat? When you know that’s not true. I can’t forgive her for that.
Edwin: I understand you’re upset. Sometimes, not being able to tell me things like before, makes her jealous and to speak with anger.
Estela: So, you’re taking her side?
Edwin: No, Estela. I always want to be with you. But not forgiving her isn’t going to help you. Show her your forgiveness, and God will reward you with His forgiveness for you. That will start changing my mother.
Estela: Thank you, Lord, for giving me this proper help. Without Him, I would never reach You.

Mother,

Thank you because You teach us to act from mercy and forgiveness, as You did with those who condemned Your Son. Blessed be He forever.

Hidden Mystery. Reflection for marriages: Matthew 6:1-6, 16-18

From the Gospel according to Matthew
6:1-6, 16-18

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Take care not to perform righteous deeds
in order that people may see them;
otherwise, you will have no recompense from your heavenly Father.
When you give alms, do not blow a trumpet before you,
as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets
to win the praise of others.
Amen, I say to you, they have received their reward.
But when you give alms,
do not let your left hand know what your right is doing,
so that your almsgiving may be secret.
And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.

“When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites,
who love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on street corners
so that others may see them.
Amen, I say to you, they have received their reward.
But when you pray, go to your inner room, close the door,
and pray to your Father in secret.
And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.

“When you fast, do not look gloomy like the hypocrites.
They neglect their appearance,
so that they may appear to others to be fasting.
Amen, I say to you, they have received their reward.
But when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face,
so that you may not appear to others to be fasting,
except to your Father who is hidden.
And your Father who sees what is hidden will repay you.”

Hidden Mystery

Lord, today You tell us that my struggle is in what is hidden, it is my inside, it is in my heart. And that is where You want to do Your Work.
The work of God is imperceptible to human eyes; only God the Father, who sees what is hidden, can perceive it.
That’s why, every time I welcome my husband when he is unpleasant with me, You make gentleness grow in me.
And every time I give myself and serve him breakfast when I don’t feel like it, You make the gift of being helpful grow in my heart.
And in that giving and welcoming between us, my heart and my husband’s heart are shaped by Yours, little by little, in the hidden things, You are doing Your Work. The two hearts merge into Yours, and then, through the sacrament of marriage, You are present and make Communion between us possible.
What a great mystery! A mighty God working in the small and the hidden!

Applied to Married Life:

María: Today I’m tired, honestly, but Sergio is coming home late and I’m sure he’ll want to eat when he gets here, so I’ll prepare something for him.
Sergio: Hi María, I’m home. Why does the whole house smell like food? I’ve told you a thousand times to turn on the extractor; the house smells awful…
(Then, María remembers the Gospel from the morning, that the Lord’s work is in the hidden things, and in welcoming her husband into her heart).
María: Yes, you’re right, you know I’m very forgetful and don’t notice these things…
(Sergio is thoughtful… and inside, he thinks about how María is preparing dinner after a whole day of work, and she doesn’t even say anything when he criticizes her for not turning on the extractor).
Sergio: María, years ago you would’ve pointed out that I came late, and that you made dinner, especially after I criticized you about the extractor… How you’ve changed since you’ve been praying!
María: Yes, Sergio, today in prayer the Lord showed me that the struggle is in my heart, where no one can see.
Sergio: Well, I also want to hear the Lord like you do. Would you help me to be persistent in prayer, like you?
María: Of course, darling, nothing would make me happier than praying together.
(And after some time, the Lord continued to work in them and in their children).

Mother,

Thank you for holding our hands and showing us the hidden Mystery in God. Lead us further each day so that we can be with Him and in Him, just like You do, Mother. We are all Yours!

Fullness. Reflection for marriages: Matthew 5:43-48

From the Gospel according to Matthew
5:43-48

Jesus said to his disciples:
“You have heard that it was said,
You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.
But I say to you, love your enemies
and pray for those who persecute you,
that you may be children of your heavenly Father,
for he makes his sun rise on the bad and the good,
and causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust.
For if you love those who love you, what recompense will you have?
Do not the tax collectors do the same?
And if you greet your brothers only,
what is unusual about that?
Do not the pagans do the same?
So be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect.”

Fullness.

Lord, You have come to bring fullness. Fullness to the law, fullness to marriage, fullness to love, fullness to life. And fullness is found in loving as You love, always doing the Father’s will, and in this way, You teach us to be children.

But what is the Father’s will for my marriage? It is that I love my husband always—no matter how he is, no matter how he responds—with Your same Love, a love that gives itself to the extreme, a perfect love.
Lord, may Your grace help me to place love where there is none, to bring joy where there is sadness, to bring hope where there is despair.
Because with You, we can do all things; without You, we are nothing.

Brought into marital life:

(During spousal prayer)
Carmen: Luis, I ask you to forgive me because sometimes I don’t know how to love you. I’m not your suitable helper when you’re “grumpy,” and I don’t see how much you’re in need—I only look at myself, at what I have to endure…
I know this is not what You want from me, Lord. Give me Your grace to love always, in every circumstance.
Luis: Carmen, don’t worry, I forgive you. I know I can be difficult at times because I trust little in the Lord, and the weight of life drags me down.
Lord, help me to trust in You. I know You are my Father, and our life is in Your hands, that all things work for our good—but sometimes I doubt. Forgive me, Lord. And forgive me too, my wife. How truly needy we are!

Mother,

Give us a compassionate heart and the joy of knowing we are cared for and sustained by You.
Praised be God who always loves us.

Give it as well. Reflection for marriages: Matthew 5:38-42

From the Gospel according to Matthew
5:38-42

Jesus said to his disciples:
“You have heard that it was said,
An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.
But I say to you, offer no resistance to one who is evil.
When someone strikes you on your right cheek,
turn the other one to him as well.
If anyone wants to go to law with you over your tunic,
hand him your cloak as well.
Should anyone press you into service for one mile,
go with him for two miles.
Give to the one who asks of you,
and do not turn your back on one who wants to borrow.”

Give it as well.

“If someone wants to take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well; if someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two.”
Lord, how many years I spent without understanding this Gospel! Because I was stuck in my human reasoning, in what seemed fair to me from my own perspective…
And now I look at You on the Cross and I see that this is love—total surrender, without prior conditions, everything for love, everything. That doesn’t fit within human logic, but it is the truth, because You, the Creator, the Almighty, created everything out of love. You created us out of love and You call us to love.
And in this Gospel, You show us how You love, You show us what love truly is.
Love is giving, love is self-giving, love is seeking to do the will of the beloved because you want the best for them. Without thinking of yourself, thinking only of the other.
That is how You love us, that is how You want us to receive Your love, and, filled with Your love, to love as You love us.

Applied to married life:

Jacobo: (Coming out of the kitchen early on a Saturday, grumbling) She knew how excited I was about having lunch with the family today, with our kids, and she just had to invite her mother and brother to come over. Ugh, I’m letting the devil get to me. I’m going to turn to the Lord.
“Lord, what should I do? You know how good it is for our family to eat together.”
(After a moment of silence, contemplating Christ’s sacrifice on the Cross, he realizes that his wife acted with the best of intentions, and maybe her brother really needs it.)
“Thank You, Jesus, for helping me see that this isn’t about being right, but about loving, about letting go of my pride so I can receive Your infinite love. If they ask for my tunic, let me give them my cloak as well. It hurts, but this is the way—it hurt You so much more, Jesus!”

Jacobo: (Returning to his wife)
Sweetheart, I’m sorry. I want to do what you think is best because I want to love you more each day. Would you like me to go pick up your mom and your brother so they can come?

Carmen: Thank you so much, love. And I truly apologize for not checking with you first—I know the Virgin wouldn’t have done it that way. Do you want to go on that walk you love this afternoon, just the two of us? I love you!

Mother,

Please enlighten us and help us to always seek to do God’s will in every situation. May we give our cloak as well when asked for our tunic.
Praised be Christ crucified.

Little by little. Reflection for marriages: John 16:12-15

From the Gospel according to John
16:12-15

Jesus said to his disciples:
“I have much more to tell you, but you cannot bear it now.
But when he comes, the Spirit of truth,
he will guide you to all truth.
He will not speak on his own,
but he will speak what he hears,
and will declare to you the things that are coming.
He will glorify me,
because he will take from what is mine and declare it to you.
Everything that the Father has is mine;
for this reason I told you that he will take from what is mine
and declare it to you.”

Little by little.

The Lord prepares us little by little; each one has their own time to understand and come to know Him.
It is the same in our marriage—we must get to know each other gradually, respecting our individual pace and learning from one another.
At all times, we must wait for the Holy Spirit to be the one who guides us, because only in this way will we grow in intimacy with the Lord and gain the ability to recognize Him in everything and everyone.
Our spouse is a reflection of God’s Love, and for that reason, we must listen with love, seeking the Lord in them. We also need to be open to being corrected, because we are not of this world, but sometimes we can be influenced by it and make mistakes.
Our spouse is that Suitable Helper through whom the Lord speaks to us; let us listen with the heart and, little by little, with the help of the Holy Spirit, we will see it.

Applied to married life:

Gemma: Jordi, I think it might be good if you were a bit more gentle with the kids. It’s great that they know the rules, but it needs to be done with kindness.
Jordi: You’re right. Sometimes I forget that, after all, they’re just children and they’re still learning how things should be done. How interesting—some time ago, it really bothered me when you corrected me, but now I can see that you do it for my good and to help me grow in Love.
Gemma: I admit that sometimes it still makes me uncomfortable too, but when I take it to prayer, I see that it’s the Lord who wants to help me grow, and you are His best instrument.
Jordi: I love how we’re both learning to listen to our Father through each other!
Gemma: The Eucharist and prayer help us let go of ourselves and become able to see Him.

Mother,

May we be docile so that it is the Holy Spirit who acts in us and through us.
Praised be the Holy Spirit.