Daily Archives: 29 April, 2024

Gentle or bitter? Reflection for marriages. Jn 14:21-26

From the Gospel according to John
Jn 14:21-26

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Whoever has my commandments and observes them
is the one who loves me.
Whoever loves me will be loved by my Father,
and I will love him and reveal myself to him.”
Judas, not the Iscariot, said to him,
“Master, then what happened that you will reveal yourself to us
and not to the world?”
Jesus answered and said to him,
“Whoever loves me will keep my word,
and my Father will love him,
and we will come to him and make our dwelling with him.
Whoever does not love me does not keep my words; yet the word you hear is not mine but that of the Father who sent me. “I have told you this while I am with you. The Advocate, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send in my name — he will teach you everything and remind you of all that I told you.”

The Gospel of the Lord.

Gentle or bitter?

Suffering is tough, but suffering without love or suffering while hating is much harder than suffering while loving. Striving to live out a marriage as God intended is difficult, but not living the marriage as God intended is like Chinese torture. Two proud spouses inflict much more harm on each other than they could by humbling themselves for love. Two spouses who try to dominate each other cause more harm. It’s nothing like the pain of self-control that gentleness requires. I decide whether I want to wear the face of bitterness or the peaceful face that gentleness brings. Spouses who live out marriage as God intended truly come to love each other because that sacrifice of mutual surrender, that self-mastery, bears the fruits of love, peace, joy, all obviously by the grace of God.

Applied to married life:

Mary: There are still times when we fall into misunderstandings, argue, and offend each other.

Peter: Yes, because even though we know that the way is that of humility, of putting myself last, of serving and not being served, etc., it’s hard to apply it to our lives.

Mary: What I’ve realised during this time is that those distances that affect us are getting shorter. They leave less residue in us each time, the wound is less deep. It’s like the Lord rebuilds it, heals it, and leaves no trace in us.

Peter: It is the Holy Spirit, who is within us. He intervenes, rebuilds us from within, redeems us, heals us. I have experienced it. I know He is in us. He is very powerful, very great, and leads us back to the path of love. By the way, what has the Holy Spirit poured into you that drives me crazy? I’m just in love with  you.

Mary: He has poured a little bit of God’s mercy into me.

Peter: How beautiful is God’s mercy.

Mary: And what has He poured into you that drives me crazy for you?

Peter: He has poured a little bit of God’s Will into me.

Mary: How beautiful is God’s Will.


How beautiful is God’s way when we allow ourselves to be led by the Holy Spirit. He shows us God’s secrets, comforts us, advises us… The more we know Him, the more we like Him. Praise be to Christ for sending us His Spirit. Glory be to God