He pushes me to love you. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 22:34-40

You shall love the Lord, your God and your neighbour as yourself. 

From the Gospel according to Matthew Mt 22:34-40

When the Pharisees heard that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, they gathered together, and one of them, a scholar of the law, tested him by asking, “Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?”
He said to him, “You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment.
The second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. The whole law and the prophets depend on these two commandments.”

The World of the Lord

He pushes me to love you.

We were created in God’s image, and everything about us is explained through Him. Even the commandments reflect this similarity: “The second is like the first.” In fact, it’s impossible to love God and not love your neighbor, and vice versa. And our closest neighbor is obviously our spouse. Anyone who says they love God but doesn’t love their spouse is lying. Loving God with all your heart, soul, and being is like loving your spouse as yourself. These are the two main commandments. I mustn’t forget them…

Applied for married life

Fred: I don’t get why you love God more than me.

Hannah: Because by loving God more, I can love you more.

Fred: I still don’t get it.

Hannah: God is freeing me from my attachments, my sins, making me freer to give more of myself to you. Remember when I was addicted to TV series? You used to complain that I wasn’t with you on Saturday afternoons. Well, God has shown me that it’s more important for us to spend Saturdays together. What do you think?

Fred: That makes sense.

Hannah: Exactly. He’s helping me let go of my selfishness, and He’s directing my desires toward our union… In fact, He’s pushing me to love you more.

Fred: Well… I’m starting to like the fact that you love God. I might need you to teach me how to love Him, too.

Hannah: Fred, you’re so good! I really love you!!!

Lord,

By welcoming my husband and my family, may I welcome You. By giving myself to them, may I give myself to You. By loving them, may I love You. Mother of spouses, pray for us. Amen.

The way to the Banquet. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 22:1-14

Invite to the feast whomever you find.

From the Gospel according to Matthew Mt 22:1-14

Jesus again in reply spoke to the chief priests and the elders of the people in parables saying, “The Kingdom of heaven may be likened to a king who gave a wedding feast for his son. He dispatched his servants to summon the invited guests to the feast, but they refused to come.
A second time he sent other servants, saying, ‘Tell those invited: “Behold, I have prepared my banquet, my calves and fattened cattle are killed, and everything is ready; come to the feast.” Some ignored the invitation and went away, one to his farm, another to his business. The rest laid hold of his servants, mistreated them, and killed them. The king was enraged and sent his troops, destroyed those murderers, and burned their city.
Then the king said to his servants, ‘The feast is ready, but those who were invited were not worthy to come. Go out, therefore, into the main roads and invite to the feast whomever you find.’
The servants went out into the streets and gathered all they found, bad and good alike, and the hall was filled with guests.
But when the king came in to meet the guests he saw a man there not dressed in a wedding garment. He said to him, ‘My friend, how is it that you came in here without a wedding garment?’ But he was reduced to silence.
Then the king said to his attendants, ‘Bind his hands and feet, and cast him into the darkness outside, where there will be wailing and grinding of teeth.’
Many are invited, but few are chosen.”

The Gospel of the Lord.

The way to the Banquet.

The marriage of the Son of God has already taken place, and you and I are invited to the wedding banquet that will be celebrated in Heaven. Will we attend?

Lord, to get there, I must first follow the same path that You took, until I give myself completely to my wife. I could choose other paths, other ways of living marriage, but I would never get to Your great banquet, because I would not be prepared to attend dressed in the appropriate attire: conjugal charity.


Applied to married life:

Phill: Sometimes I have the feeling that God is constantly watching over me. Things happen to me that cannot be a coincidence, it seems to me that He speaks to me in every situation… or in the Gospel.

Rachel: And what do you do about it?

Paco: I don’t know what to do.

Raquel: You have to find out, the Lord is calling you to something great.

Phill: What do I have to do?

Rachel: Let us approach Him together, let us consecrate ourselves to Him, let us put our lives in His hands, let us welcome every situation as if it came from Him…

(Phill reluctantly ended up doing it)

Phill: Now I understand everything. I was a dead man in life, and by feeding my soul, I have discovered the beauty of our vocation, of my life. Now I find meaning in almost everything that happens.

Rachel: The Lord never disappoints. And you shall see greater things…


Mother,

I understand the pain of Your Heart, when You have prepared an banquet for us and we do not strive to respond to the Lord’s call to holiness, out of laziness or for a thousand excuses that we can think of. We know that God is great and something great awaits us. We do not want to miss it. Praise the Lord. Amen.

Last Train. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 20:1-16

Are you envious because I am generous?

 

From the Gospel according to Matthew
Mt 20:1-16

Jesus told his disciples this parable:
“The Kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out at dawn to hire laborers for his vineyard. After agreeing with them for the usual daily wage, he sent them into his vineyard.
Going out about nine o’clock, he saw others standing idle in the marketplace, and he said to them, ‘You too go into my vineyard, and I will give you what is just.’ So they went off. And he went out again around noon, and around three o’clock, and did likewise.
Going out about five o’clock, he found others standing around, and said to them, ‘Why do you stand here idle all day?’
They answered, ‘Because no one has hired us.’
He said to them, ‘You too go into my vineyard.’
When it was evening the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman, ‘Summon the laborers and give them their pay, beginning with the last and ending with the first.’
When those who had started about five o’clock came, each received the usual daily wage.
So when the first came, they thought that they would receive more, but each of them also got the usual wage. And on receiving it they grumbled against the landowner, saying, ‘These last ones worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us, who bore the day’s burden and the heat.’
He said to one of them in reply, ‘My friend, I am not cheating you.  Did you not agree with me for the usual daily wage? Take what is yours and go. What if I wish to give this last one the same as you? Or am I not free to do as I wish with my own money? Are you envious because I am generous?’
Thus, the last will be first, and the first will be last.

The Gospel of the Lord

 

Last Train

This Gospel, far from provoking envy in us, brings us wonderful hope whenever we think about those lost children, those family members and friends who don’t want anything to do with God, all those spouses who have left their partners and are now living with someone else, missing out on the greatness, beauty, and sacredness of the Sacrament of Marriage.

We pray for all of them, so that, in that final moment of divine mercy, they may respond to the Lord’s call and receive the same reward as those who have been faithful their whole lives. God is good and free to do what He wills with His own. It’s true that we’ve chosen the narrow path, but it’s also true that we’ve tasted the Lord’s grace, and that is priceless.

 

Applied to married life

Helen: I’m worried about all those marriages that don’t embrace the grace of their sacrament and suffer pointlessly because of it… I wish their sufferings were fruitful suffering for the praise of the Lord, but suffering because they’re not accepting God’s love is just terrible.

Frank: Absolutely. I’m not just going to stay still, even if it means getting coffees and heading over to the house of strangers like we’ve done before.

Helen: I know, but still, so many say no and end up splitting up…

Frank: There was a time when Proyecto Amor Conyugal suggested offering online catechesis for spouses who have left or been left by their partners but want to dig deeper into the truth of Marriage. Maybe one of the couples in the Project will be inspired to get it going. After all, those couples still have a marital bond, and Virgin Mary doesn’t give up on anyone.

Helen: We’ll pray for that, so that a couple will be inspired to take those catechesis.

Frank: A rosary?

Helen: Let’s do it!

 

Mother,

You don’t want anyone to be lost, even if they catch the last coach of the last train of hope. Neither do we, and we place ourselves at Your service to do whatever needs to be done. God’s Glory is that everyone lives. Praise Him forever.

Demands into Gratitude. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 19:23-30

It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for one who is rich to enter the Kingdom of God

 

From the Gospel according to Matthew
Mt 19:23-30

 

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Amen, I say to you, it will be hard for one who is rich to enter the Kingdom of heaven.
Again I say to you, it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for one who is rich to enter the Kingdom of God.”
When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and said,
“Who then can be saved?”
Jesus looked at them and said,

“For men this is impossible, but for God all things are possible.”
Then Peter said to him in reply,
“We have given up everything and followed you.
What will there be for us?”
Jesus said to them, “Amen, I say to you
that you who have followed me, in the new age, when the Son of Man is seated on his throne of glory, will yourselves sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel.
And everyone who has given up houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands for the sake of my name will receive a hundred times more, and will inherit eternal life.
But many who are first will be last, and the last will be first.”

 

 

Demands into Gratitude

When I try to elevate myself above others, whether through wealth or abuse of power, I find that God brings down the mighty from their thrones and lifts up the humble, raising them to a throne of glory. For example, those power struggles in marriage, that pride in wanting to control more or be right, those demands that drive me to seek power on earth, only to end up last in heaven (if I even get there). So, what do I do? I have to replace those attitudes with valuing the other as a gift from God, something I don’t truly deserve. I need to replace demands with gratitude.

What does God expect from me? To recognize my inability and beg for His Grace, acknowledging His Fatherly Love in all He gives me, especially in my vocation.

 

 

Applied to married life:

Carl: Forgive me, Sofia. I have to admit that I haven’t appreciated you enough. You’re the only person in my life who has given up everything for me. You left behind your single life’s fun to dedicate yourself to me. You turned down any other man, even if he was richer, more handsome, or more charming. You made me a priority over your parents. You didn’t have time to browse magazines or shop because you were praying with me, talking with me, or caring for our children. You wanted to say “yes” to the Lord through your love for me. And you, dear Sofia, have given me the most valuable thing in your world: yourself. That’s why you are the most valuable thing in my world. Because of all this, I know how much you love me. Thank you, Sofia.

Sofia: I, too, Carl, have to ask for your forgiveness because I also haven’t valued the gift that God gave me through you. How many beers with friends you’ve skipped, how many games, how many hours of free time spent working, you’ve given up your hobbies, and many of your ideas you’ve changed out of love for me. You became my husband, and that is priceless. Thank you, Carl. Because of all this, I know how much you love me.

Children of Carl and Sofia: Thank you, Dad, thank you, Mom. What a beautiful example of married life you’ve given us. This day, as you celebrate your 40th anniversary, will be etched in our hearts forever… because you have shown us the way of love through your lives.

 

 

Mother,

Deep down, it’s as simple and yet as difficult as putting love for God above all else. In my vocation, that means loving my husband, and as the fruit of that love, our children. It’s impossible for me, but not for God, and He has my “yes.

Perfect Marriage. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 19:16-22

If you wish to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give it to the poor, and you will have a treasure in heaven.

From the Gospel according to Matthew
MT 19:16-22

“Teacher, what good must I do to gain eternal life?”
He answered him, “Why do you ask me about the good? There is only One who is good. If you wish to enter into life, keep the commandments.”
He asked him, “Which ones?”
And Jesus replied, “You shall not kill; you shall not commit adultery; you shall not steal; you shall not bear false witness; honor your father and your mother; and you shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
The young man said to him, “All of these I have observed. What do I still lack?”
Jesus said to him, “If you wish to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven.Then come, follow me.”
When the young man heard this statement, he went away sad, for he had many possessions.

The Gospel of the Lord

Perfect Marriage

Love God above all things. That’s the first commandment, and it’s not easy to follow if we consider the consequences it could have on my life. The greatest love is shown when I give up something valuable because of that love. The key is: everything is a gift from God. If God gives it to me, praise be to Him; God takes it away, praise be to Him.

Priests and those who are consecrated give up marriage and family for the Kingdom of Heaven. This high-value sacrifice, made out of love for the only true Spouse, shows the relevance of the gift of celibacy or virginity they’ve received. But what about me as a husband? Am I willing to give up the gift of my marriage out of love for the only Spouse? That’s how you live marriage as a Sacrament of the Spouse’s Love. In this way, a husband who has been abandoned by his spouse can still aspire to live a truly dignified, valuable, fulfilling, and holy marriage out of love for the Spouse, even in the absence of his partner. Let’s not take this privilege away from them. Yes, it’s not a tragedy—it’s a very special privilege that God grants to a few to restore the true value of the Sacrament of Marriage according to God’s love for us.

Applied to married life

Carmel: I’ve realized that I was becoming too attached to our marriage, which is why I was so demanding about your behavior towards me.

David: I have no idea what you’re trying to say.

Carmel: Well, marriage is a vocation that involves giving myself to you out of love for Christ. If I’m putting conditions on our relationship, it stops being about giving out of love for Christ and starts becoming an attachment out of self-love.

David: So that means I should be willing to give up living in true communion with you out of love for Christ.

Carmel: Wanting that communion isn’t bad, but ultimately, the love between us is a gift from God. If we want this love to be perfect, we have to be willing to give up physical love for a greater Love, which is spiritual in our giving ourselves to the true Spouse. Look at the love Christ received in His earthly life, to the point where He was crucified—and we’re talking about the Master of all husbands.

David: With that mindset, there’s no such thing as a bad marriage.

Carmel: Exactly. Spouses who are willing to give up everything are the ones who can live a perfect marriage.


Mother,

Pray for us in our marital love.