From the Gospel according to John 19:25-27

Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother
and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas,
and Mary Magdalene.
When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he loved
he said to his mother, “Woman, behold, your son.”
Then he said to the disciple,
“Behold, your mother.”
And from that hour the disciple took her into his home.

Gospel

From the Gospel according to John
3:13-17

Jesus said to Nicodemus:
“No one has gone up to heaven
except the one who has come down from heaven, the Son of Man.
And just as Moses lifted up the serpent in the desert,
so must the Son of Man be lifted up,
so that everyone who believes in him may have eternal life.”

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son,
so that everyone who believes in him might not perish
but might have eternal life.
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world,
but that the world might be saved through him.

The Gospel of the Lord

The Beautiful Life

Today I celebrate the source of the good life. The true life. The most beautiful life.
Today I exalt the way of living that Jesus teaches me through His Spirit. Born within me through baptism. Growing in the Eucharist. Loving in marriage. Healing me in confession.
Today I proclaim a way of dying that prepares my soul for His action, His motions, His gifts, His life, through the fruits/sacraments of His self-giving.

Brought down to Married Life:

James: Darling, do you remember what day it is today?
Nicole: I can’t quite recall.
James: Today marks five years since the day my addiction came to light. The day that could have been the worst of my life but instead became the first day of my new life. And I owe it all to you. To the way you welcomed me despite the pain I caused you.
Nicole: How happy and proud I am of you, my love. But you’re mistaken in one thing. The One we owe it to is our God, who through His death pierced our darkness and opened the doors to His life.
James: Darling, how much I learn from you. Your gaze is the place where God speaks to me and sustains me. I love you so deeply.
Nicole: Loving you is my way of letting myself be loved by Him.

Mother,

Blessed and praised be the fruit of your womb, Jesus, who redeemed us with His Blood.

He Had Compassion…

How moving it is to see how Jesus took pity on this poor widow, and how much hope it should inspire in us to know that the Lord has compassion on us too. At times, we may fall into the temptation of thinking that God is “too busy” with other, more important matters than us. Nothing could be further from the truth: He loves us infinitely and wants us to be happy, living out the plan He has prepared for us, for our marriage. And it pains Him when we turn away from that plan. And when do we turn away? Each time we think, do, or say anything guided by our own criteria rather than by love, we return to the Passion of the Lord; we scourge Him again, press the crown of thorns into His head, and nail Him once more to the Cross.
Let us therefore ask the Lord to help us have compassion, first of all for our spouse, and of course also for our children, family, and friends. At times, it may seem easier to have compassion for others, but we must be consistent with our vocation and live an undivided life, beginning this attitude in our own home.

Brought down to Married Life:

Benjamin: Darling, have you noticed how the children went off to school today? I think you should pay a little more attention to the details and help them get ready in the mornings.
Beth: Seriously, are you going to reproach me for how the children are dressed? You know that at that hour I barely have time to get everything done and, honestly, I can never count on you. By the time I realise, you’ve already left, and sometimes I feel very much alone.

(Later that night, during their couple’s prayer…)

Benjamin: The Lord, through this Gospel, has shown me that I must first take care of you and the children, and only then of others, of my work… What use is it to do great things or big projects if, in the end, I fail to do so at home first? Forgive me — truly, I wasn’t aware of how alone I had left you. I will make an effort to be more attentive to you and the children, but I will need your help — and, if possible, without reproaches, because otherwise my pride makes it much harder for me.
Beth: Darling, I love that you can recognise what the Lord is saying to you and that you share it with me afterwards. I love you so much!

Mother,

We ask you to help us to recognise the needs of our spouse (and of all those close to us), so that we may live like the Lord, with hearts ready to give of themselves at all times.
Praise be to the Lord.

Gospel of the day

From the Gospel according to Luke 6:43-49

Jesus said to his disciples:
“A good tree does not bear rotten fruit,
nor does a rotten tree bear good fruit.
For every tree is known by its own fruit.
For people do not pick figs from thornbushes,
nor do they gather grapes from brambles.
A good person out of the store of goodness in his heart produces good,
but an evil person out of a store of evil produces evil;
for from the fullness of the heart the mouth speaks.

“Why do you call me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ but not do what I command?
I will show you what someone is like who comes to me,
listens to my words, and acts on them.
That one is like a man building a house,
who dug deeply and laid the foundation on rock;
when the flood came, the river burst against that house
but could not shake it because it had been well built.
But the one who listens and does not act
is like a person who built a house on the ground
without a foundation.
When the river burst against it,
it collapsed at once and was completely destroyed.”

Putting the Word into Practice

How important it is to listen to the Word of God! Jesus reminds us of it time and again. When He was asked which was the greatest commandment, before saying you shall love the Lord your God, He first said: “Hear, O Israel.” When Martha tried to criticise her sister Mary for listening to Jesus instead of helping her, He told her that Mary had chosen the better part. And in this Gospel He repeats it once more. Listening to the Word of God is essential for nourishing the spirit: “Man does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.”

But it is not only a matter of listening; we must also put the Word into practice — that is, to carry it in the heart and make it life, to live in accordance with the Word. Jesus calls prudent the one who listens to His Word and puts it into practice, the one who lives according to His teaching; and He calls foolish the one who listens but does not act. He compares the first to a man who builds upon rock, and the second to one who builds upon sand.

And I? What do I do? Do I build my life, my marriage, upon rock, or upon sand? Do I listen to Jesus and put His Word into practice? Do I listen to my spouse? Do I believe that the Lord speaks to me through my husband or wife? Do I try to please them at all times? Do I truly strive to become one flesh with my spouse? Do I make daily spousal prayer and share my intimacy with my husband or wife, seeking true communion?

For that is what Christ reminds us is the essence of marriage as God intended it: “A man shall leave his father and mother, and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This is God’s will for spouses: that they build a true communion.

Brought into Married Life:

(Leo sends a voice message to his wife)

Leo: Margaret, I have to accompany the boss to a reception, and we’ll finish late. Don’t wait for me for supper.

(When Leo arrives home, late, Margaret is waiting for him.)

Margaret: Hello, love. Have you eaten? Shall I make you something?

Leo: No need, darling. Thank God they gave us something at the reception. But thank you so much for offering.

Margaret: Do you think we could do our spousal prayer?

Leo: Margaret, sweetheart, it’s past midnight and I’m exhausted. What I need is to rest and sleep.

Margaret: But we didn’t pray yesterday either…

Leo: These are difficult days.

Margaret: Precisely for that reason — this is the moment to persevere, to keep choosing spousal prayer even when it costs us an effort, because we’ve already seen the good it does us. I believe we’re laying the proper foundations of our marriage now; even if the fruits aren’t immediately visible, they are allowing us to build firmly upon them. Look back and see how much we’ve grown as a couple since we began praying together.

Leo: Yes, spousal prayer has really united us.

Margaret: And we’ve also seen the consequences of leaving it aside.

Leo: Yes, the arguments over silly things came back, the resentments, and pride stopped us from recognising one another as the gift we are for each other.

Margaret: Exactly. I don’t want to go back to that again. That’s why I waited for you, even though I’m tired too, so that we can pray before bed and not let two days go by without spousal prayer.

Leo: You’re right, love. It’s the tempter trying to keep us from it, because he knows the good it brings. Thank you so much for your effort and your perseverance. Truly, prayer has changed our marriage, and I don’t want to go back to how it was before either. Let’s do our spousal prayer — I’m sure the Lord will grant us restful sleep afterwards.

(And they persevered in spousal prayer, and built their marriage upon rock, and their marriage grew and bore abundant fruit.)

Mother,

Teach us to listen to the Word of God and to live always in accordance with it, as you did — treasuring it in your heart and putting it into practice. Blessed are you, Mother! Praised be the Lord!

Gospel of the day

From the Gospel according to Luke 6:39-42

Jesus told his disciples a parable:

“Can a blind person guide a blind person?
Will not both fall into a pit?
No disciple is superior to the teacher;
but when fully trained,
every disciple will be like his teacher.
Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s eye,
but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own?
How can you say to your brother,
‘Brother, let me remove that splinter in your eye,’
when you do not even notice the wooden beam in your own eye?
You hypocrite! Remove the wooden beam from your eye first;
then you will see clearly
to remove the splinter in your brother’s eye.”

Sharing the Creator’s Gaze

Lord, how easy it is for us to judge our husband’s actions.

If he shouts at the children, if he argues with his mother, if he only thinks about work—if, if, if… we could spend so much time thinking about all the things we believe he should do better. It seems incredible that we attended the Project retreat, learnt that we must change our way of seeing, went through years of catechesis, and yet at the first opportunity we fall back again. And that is only when it comes to our husband; when it is about our in-laws, colleagues, friends or clients, our gaze is even harsher. And You have told us in words that could not be clearer: “First take the plank out of your own eye.” And how can we do that? With a visit to the Tabernacle, placing all our thoughts before You, with a thorough examination of conscience and a sincere confession: that way our vision is cleansed and we begin to see the beauty within all Your children.

Applied to married life

Michael: Hello Rachel, how was your day? (he comes close and kisses her)

Rachel: Oh Michael, fine here, as always. This morning was very busy with work, but today the children behaved quite well, they did their homework and ate their supper without a fuss. And you—how was your day?

Michael: It was a complicated one. Things were so much easier when I wasn’t the manager. But now that I have to keep an eye on my team, I realise they don’t put in nearly as much effort as they should. They’re always trying to do as little as possible. Today Robert was the last straw—he was supposed to hand in two reports and then told me his daughter had just been left by her boyfriend. What on earth has that got to do with work? Honestly, he’s so irresponsible.

Rachel: Oh, I’m really sorry. If you like, after supper we can make our couple’s prayer and you can place it before the Lord.

(Later)

Michael: Lord, I ask Your forgiveness for all the unfair judgements I make. Rachel, during prayer the Lord reminded me that Robert’s daughter struggles with an eating disorder. I can only imagine how much it must have worried him that, just as she was starting to improve, her boyfriend left her. I realise I haven’t been to confession for quite a while and my way of seeing has become clouded. I’ve lost awareness of my own sin.

Rachel: Go to the priest without hesitation and without fear. Tell him honestly how you feel, and he will help you to make a good confession. He is there in Christ’s name; I’m sure it will help you greatly.

Michael: I’ll do that tomorrow, and I hope you can come with me. I also want to thank you, because when I told you about my problem you listened with such kindness and didn’t judge me.

Rachel: Well, I actually went to confession this morning during breakfast hour. It’s such a blessing—ever since I started taking a piece of fruit to work and, instead of going to the café, I pop into the church nearby to spend a few minutes in prayer. It’s been wonderful for my body’s health and, even more importantly, much better for the health of my soul. Praised be God, who loves us so much and is always waiting for us!

Mother,

No one like you knows how to see the truth and the beauty within each of us. We ask you to teach us to look at our husband, children, friends… in the same way. Blessed are you, and blessed is the fruit of your womb, Jesus!