Daily Archives: 13 October, 2026

A clear gaze. Reflection for married couples. Luke 11:37-41

From the Gospel according to Luke 11:37-41
At that time: While Jesus was speaking, a Pharisee asked him to dine with him, so he went in and reclined at table. The Pharisee was astonished to see that he did not first wash before dinner. And the Lord said to him, ‘Now you Pharisees cleanse the outside of the cup and of the dish, but inside you are full of greed and wickedness. You fools! Did not he who made the outside make the inside also? But give as alms those things that are within, and behold, everything is clean for you.’
A clear gaze

While dating, we looked at our future spouse with admiration. We discovered their virtues, marvelled at their gifts, and almost everything about them seemed beautiful to us. But, as time goes by, our sin can gradually cloud that vision. We stop admiring and start judging, stop giving thanks and start making demands, until we end up seeing their faults before we see the gift God has given us.

Today, the Lord invites us not to content ourselves with cleaning “the outside”, trying to change the other person so that they fit our expectations. He invites us to look within, to purify our own hearts and, from there, recover a clear gaze.

“Give alms from what is within,” Jesus tells us. Let us therefore offer the gifts we carry within us, which the Lord has given us: our understanding, our tenderness, our forgiveness… and let us stop making demands and begin to give of ourselves.

Brought into married life:

Andrew: Darling, remember, we’re leaving for dinner in five minutes!
Beth: Andrew, you know I like to look my best when we go out. I’m not sure five minutes will be enough time to put my make-up on.
Andrew: I don’t know why you bother with make-up when you’re already so beautiful. You don’t need to put all that stuff on!
Beth: I love you, darling, but wrinkles have to be concealed. I’m not getting any younger…
Andrew: Well, I’ll tell you something: your inner beauty is so great that it shines through on the outside. I’m telling you that as your husband, but other people notice it too—and I’m not just paying you a compliment!
Beth: Come on, Andrew, stop it or you’ll make me vain, and that’s not a good thing.
Andrew: Sorry if I’m embarrassing you, but I can see how you nurture your inner life, how you try to stay close to the Lord, and that eventually shines through on the outside.
Beth: Thank you, darling… the credit belongs to the Lord. The closer we are to Him, the more we can reflect His beauty. You help me so much to draw closer to Him, too.

Mother,

help us to live through Him, with Him and in Him.

Blessed and praised be God for ever!