Daily Archives: 22 August, 2026

Do What I Say. Reflections for Married Couples. Matthew 23,1-12

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Gospel of the Day

From the Gospel according to Matthew 23,1-12
At that time: Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples, ‘The scribes and the Pharisees sit on Moses’ seat, so do and observe whatever they tell you, but not the works they do. For they preach, but do not practise. They tie up heavy burdens, hard to bear, and lay them on people’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to move them with their finger. They do all their deeds to be seen by others. For they make their phylacteries broad and their fringes long, and they love the place of honour at feasts and the best seats in the synagogues and greetings in the market-places and being called rabbi by others. But you are not to be called rabbi, for you have one teacher, and you are all brothers and sisters. And call no man your father on earth, for you have one Father, who is in heaven. Neither be called instructors, for you have one instructor, the Christ. The greatest among you shall be your servant. Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.’
 
 
The Gospel of the Lord
 

Do What I Say

In this Gospel, the Lord corrects us and draws our attention to three things.

The first concerns the inconsistency between what we say and what we do. We must be careful not to demand more of our spouse than we demand of ourselves, simply because we are the one who brings the money home, or because we have a better job, or because we are more eloquent… Our example gives our words credibility. The greatest gift a spouse and a parent can give to their husband or wife, or to their child, is their own conversion, because words may convince to some extent, but example speaks far more powerfully.

The second correction concerns vanity. Why do I do the things I do? Why do I want to be a catechism teacher? Or coordinate a retreat? Or lead a retreat? If it is in order to receive recognition, we need to be careful, because we would be turning ourselves into the end rather than allowing the Lord to use us as a means for others.

The third correction is about not becoming insensitive to the gifts we have received from God. Let us not allow ourselves to be called teachers, because only God is the Teacher. We are His instruments. We are what we are through God’s calling and entrustment.

At the end of the passage, He shows us the way: humility, as the light that helps us overcome our own Phariseeism.

Brought Down to Married Life

Lucy: John, I’ve realised something… We love going on retreats, sharing our testimony and being seen as a committed married couple, but when we get home, we keep falling back into the same attitudes.

John: Yes, darling. Sometimes we care more about appearing to be an exemplary married couple than about allowing God to truly transform our hearts.

Lucy: Jesus says to us today: «They do everything so that people will see them». Perhaps we seek recognition more than our union with Christ.

John: And we can even demand from other married couples what we ourselves are not yet living, placing burdens on them that we are not willing to carry ourselves.

Lucy: John, everything we have received through the retreats should help us to love each other more, not to feed our image.

John: Then our true retreat begins here, when we return home and choose to listen to each other, forgive each other, make sacrifices and serve one another.

Lucy: You’re right, John. I do not want people to admire us. I want them, even in the midst of our weaknesses, to be able to discover that Christ is transforming our marriage.

John: Neither do I, darling. Because true greatness does not lie in people seeing us, but in Jesus being seen in the way we love one another.

Mother,

Teach us to be humble like You, so that God may grow in our hearts.

Blessed and praised be You for ever, Lord.