He saw and believed. Reflection for marriages. John 20:1-9

From the Gospel according to John 20:1-9

On the first day of the week, Mary of Magdala came to the tomb early in the morning, while it was still dark, and saw the stone removed from the tomb. So she ran and went to Simon Peter and to the other disciple whom Jesus loved, and told them, “They have taken the Lord from the tomb, and we don’t know where they put him.” So Peter and the other disciple went out and came to the tomb. They both ran, but the other disciple ran faster than Peter and arrived at the tomb first; he bent down and saw the burial cloths there, but did not go in. When Simon Peter arrived after him, he went into the tomb and saw the burial cloths there, and the cloth that had covered his head, not with the burial cloths but rolled up in a separate place. Then the other disciple also went in, the one who had arrived at the tomb first, and he saw and believed. For they did not yet understand the Scripture that he had to rise from the dead.

He saw and believed.

Today we celebrate the great day: Easter! the Lord’s passing through our lives, the reason for our faith, the Resurrection of our Savior! He who died for us has risen today! Dear spouses, He makes all things new: our life, our marriage, our family, our hearts because we too are called to the Resurrection. Let us believe like the disciple. Christ is risen! Happy Easter!

Applied to married life:

Helena: Luis, I think this year we are living Easter like never before.
Louis: Yes, Helena not only Easter, which is the culmination of all Holy Week, but also the Passion. God has granted us to live it deeply this year.
Helena: Yes, it’s true, it’s as if He prepared us throughout Lent and then this whole past week to experience the joy we feel today, Easter as if our understanding has awakened, and now we can truly understand.
Louis: Exactly, because in a way we too have risen with Christ. This year we’ve discovered the wonder our marriage can be; this has led our family to be more united, with more joy and peace. And even though we have gone through some crosses, we’ve seen that by living them with Him, we have found peace. And this is our Easter.
Helena: Yes, Christ has passed through our lives and has risen in us. Happy Easter, my dear husband!
Louis: Happy Easter, my wife!

Mother,

Thank you, dear Mother, for being with us every day. May we one day celebrate Easter with you in Heaven. Glory to God!

Rejoice, do not be afraid. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 28:1-10

A reading from the Holy Gospel according to Saint Matthew 28:110

After the sabbath, as the first day of the week was dawning, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to see the tomb. And suddenly there was a great earthquake; for an angel of the Lord, descending from heaven, came and rolled back the stone and sat on it. His appearance was like lightning, and his clothing white as snow. For fear of him the guards shook and became like dead men. But the angel said to the women, ‘Do not be afraid; I know that you are looking for Jesus who was crucified. He is not here; for he has been raised, as he said. Come, see the place where he* lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples, “He has been raised from the dead,* and indeed he is going ahead of you to Galilee; there you will see him.” This is my message for you.’ So they left the tomb quickly with fear and great joy, and ran to tell his disciples. Suddenly Jesus met them and said, ‘Greetings!’ And they came to him, took hold of his feet, and worshipped him. Then Jesus said to them, ‘Do not be afraid; go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me.’ 

 

Rejoice, do not be afraid.

Today, on this Holy Saturday, we accompany our Mother in the silence of the tomb, waiting for the light brought by Christ’s Resurrection. The earth trembles, the stone is moved, and an angel announces what seemed impossible: Jesus has risen!

So too in our married life, at times everything can seem still, heavy, even lifeless when doubts, fears, fatigue, or selfishness seem to rule our hearts. Today Christ invites us to look beyond our darkness, to discover the light that conquers sin and death, and to live in the truth of a love that transforms daily life into a reflection of His divine love.

To love our spouse with Christ’s love is to live the Resurrection day by day: to die to selfishness and be born into self-giving, to die to pride and live in communion. Like the two Marys who went to the tomb, we sometimes lack the faith to believe that after sacrifice, life always comes. We find it hard to accept that self-giving out of love, even when it hurts or requires sacrifice, leads to fullness and joy.

Christ assures us that even in doubt and fear, He goes before us and says: “Rejoice.” He calls us to be witnesses of His love and to live in communion with Him, so that His work may be made visible in us and through us. May we learn to walk toward that light, embracing our spouse and living true love where Christ rises and hope is reborn.

Applied to married life:

Mary: David, today in prayer I felt that our love has gone through a resurrection.
David: Resurrection?
Mary: Yes… before, we loved each other from ourselves, measuring, comparing, expecting from the other… and that made it fragile.
David: That’s true, Mary… a very limited kind of love.
Mary: But now it feels different, as if it is born from Christ. When we allow ourselves to be filled by Him, we can love each other with peace, without demands or fear.
David: And everything changes… not because difficulties disappear, but because there is a source that sustains our love.
Mary: Exactly, my love. Our love now lives from something that does not run out, because it is born and sustained in Christ, the source of life and hope.

Mother,

Help us to remain beside your Son in silence and waiting, so that the light of His Resurrection may always fill our hearts. Blessed and praised are You forever, Lord!

Giving One’s Life. Reflection for marriages. John 18:1-19:42

From the Gospel according to John, 18:1—19:42

Jesus went out with his disciples across the Kidron valley to where there was a garden, into which he and his disciples entered. Judas his betrayer also knew the place,
because Jesus had often met there with his disciples. So Judas got a band of soldiers and guards from the chief priests and the Pharisees and went there with lanterns, torches, and weapons. Jesus, knowing everything that was going to happen to him, went out and said to them, “Whom are you looking for?”
They answered him, “Jesus the Nazorean.”
He said to them, “I AM.”
Judas his betrayer was also with them. When he said to them, “I AM,“ they turned away and fell to the ground.
So he again asked them, “Whom are you looking for?”
They said, “Jesus the Nazorean.”
Jesus answered, “I told you that I AM. So if you are looking for me, let these men go.” This was to fulfill what he had said, “I have not lost any of those you gave me.” Then Simon Peter, who had a sword, drew it, struck the high priest’s slave, and cut off his right ear. The slave’s name was Malchus. Jesus said to Peter, “Put your sword into its scabbard. Shall I not drink the cup that the Father gave me?” So the band of soldiers, the tribune, and the Jewish guards seized Jesus, bound him, and brought him to Annas first. He was the father-in-law of Caiaphas, who was high priest that year. It was Caiaphas who had counseled the Jews that it was better that one man should die rather than the people.
Simon Peter and another disciple followed Jesus. Now the other disciple was known to the high priest, and he entered the courtyard of the high priest with Jesus. But Peter stood at the gate outside. So the other disciple, the acquaintance of the high priest, went out and spoke to the gatekeeper and brought Peter in. Then the maid who was the gatekeeper said to Peter, “You are not one of this man’s disciples, are you?” He said, “I am not.” Now the slaves and the guards were standing around a charcoal fire that they had made, because it was cold, and were warming themselves. Peter was also standing there keeping warm.
The high priest questioned Jesus about his disciples and about his doctrine. Jesus answered him, “I have spoken publicly to the world. I have always taught in a synagogue or in the temple area where all the Jews gather, and in secret I have said nothing. Why ask me? Ask those who heard me what I said to them. They know what I said.” When he had said this, one of the temple guards standing there struck Jesus and said, “Is this the way you answer the high priest?” Jesus answered him, “If I have spoken wrongly, testify to the wrong; but if I have spoken rightly, why do you strike me?” Then Annas sent him bound to Caiaphas the high priest.
Now Simon Peter was standing there keeping warm. And they said to him, “You are not one of his disciples, are you?” He denied it and said, “I am not.” One of the slaves of the high priest, a relative of the one whose ear Peter had cut off, said, “Didn’t I see you in the garden with him?” Again Peter denied it. And immediately the cock crowed.
Then they brought Jesus from Caiaphas to the praetorium. It was morning. And they themselves did not enter the praetorium, in order not to be defiled so that they could eat the Passover. So Pilate came out to them and said, “What charge do you bring against this man?” They answered and said to him, “If he were not a criminal, we would not have handed him over to you.” At this, Pilate said to them, “Take him yourselves, and judge him according to your law.”
The Jews answered him, “We do not have the right to execute anyone, “ in order that the word of Jesus might be fulfilled that he said indicating the kind of death he would die. So Pilate went back into the praetorium and summoned Jesus and said to him, “Are you the King of the Jews?” Jesus answered, “Do you say this on your own or have others told you about me?” Pilate answered, “I am not a Jew, am I? Your own nation and the chief priests handed you over to me. What have you done? ”Jesus answered, “My kingdom does not belong to this world. If my kingdom did belong to this world, my attendants would be fighting to keep me from being handed over to the Jews. But as it is, my kingdom is not here.” So Pilate said to him, “Then you are a king?” Jesus answered, “You say I am a king. For this I was born and for this I came into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to my voice.” Pilate said to him, “What is truth?”
When he had said this, he again went out to the Jews and said to them, “I find no guilt in him. But you have a custom that I release one prisoner to you at Passover. Do you want me to release to you the King of the Jews?” They cried out again, “Not this one but Barabbas!” Now Barabbas was a revolutionary.
Then Pilate took Jesus and had him scourged. And the soldiers wove a crown out of thorns and placed it on his head, and clothed him in a purple cloak, and they came to him and said, “Hail, King of the Jews!” And they struck him repeatedly. Once more Pilate went out and said to them, “Look, I am bringing him out to you, so that you may know that I find no guilt in him.” So Jesus came out, wearing the crown of thorns and the purple cloak. And he said to them, “Behold, the man!” When the chief priests and the guards saw him they cried out, “Crucify him, crucify him!” Pilate said to them, “Take him yourselves and crucify him. I find no guilt in him.” The Jews answered, “We have a law, and according to that law he ought to die, because he made himself the Son of God.” Now when Pilate heard this statement, he became even more afraid, and went back into the praetorium and said to Jesus, “Where are you from?” Jesus did not answer him. So Pilate said to him, “Do you not speak to  me? Do you not know that I have power to release you and I have power to crucify you?” Jesus answered him, “You would have no power over me if it had not been given to you from above. For this reason the one who handed me over to you has the greater sin.” Consequently, Pilate tried to release him; but the Jews cried out, “If you release him, you are not a Friend of Caesar. Everyone who makes himself a king opposes Caesar.”
When Pilate heard these words he brought Jesus out and seated him on the judge’s bench in the place called Stone Pavement, in Hebrew, Gabbatha. It was preparation day for Passover, and it was about noon. And he said to the Jews, “Behold, your king!” They cried out, “Take him away, take him away! Crucify him!” Pilate said to them, “Shall I crucify your king?” The chief priests answered, “We have no king but Caesar.” Then he handed him over to them to be crucified.
So they took Jesus, and, carrying the cross himself, he went out to what is called the Place of the Skull, in Hebrew, Golgotha. There they crucified him, and with him two others, one on either side, with Jesus in the middle. Pilate also had an inscription written and put on the cross. It read, “Jesus the Nazorean, the King of the Jews.” Now many of the Jews read this inscription, because the place where Jesus was crucified was near the city; and it was written in Hebrew, Latin, and Greek. So the chief priests of the Jews said to Pilate, “Do not write ‘The King of the Jews,’ but that he said, ‘I am the King of the Jews’.” Pilate answered, “What I have written, I have written.”
When the soldiers had crucified Jesus, they took his clothes and divided them into four shares, a share for each soldier. They also took his tunic, but the tunic was seamless, woven in one piece from the top down. So they said to one another, “Let’s not tear it, but cast lots for it to see whose it will be, “ in order that the passage of Scripture might be fulfilled that says: They divided my garments among them, and for my vesture they cast lots. This is what the soldiers did. Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary of Magdala. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he loved he said to his mother, “Woman, behold, your son.” Then he said to the disciple, “Behold, your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his home.
After this, aware that everything was now finished, in order that the Scripture might be fulfilled, Jesus said, “I thirst.” There was a vessel filled with common wine. So they put a sponge soaked in wine on a sprig of hyssop and put it up to his mouth. When Jesus had taken the wine, he said, “It is finished.” And bowing his head, he handed over the spirit.
Here all kneel and pause for a short time.
Now since it was preparation day, in order that the bodies might not remain on the cross on the sabbath, for the sabbath day of that week was a solemn one, the Jews asked Pilate that their legs be broken and that they be taken down. So the soldiers came and broke the legs of the first and then of the other one who was crucified with Jesus. But when they came to Jesus and saw that he was already dead, they did not break his legs, but one soldier thrust his lance into his side, and immediately blood and water flowed out. An eyewitness has testified, and his testimony is true; he knows that he is speaking the truth, so that you also may come to believe. For this happened so that the Scripture passage might be fulfilled: Not a bone of it will be broken. And again another passage says: They will look upon him whom they have pierced.
After this, Joseph of Arimathea, secretly a disciple of Jesus for fear of the Jews, asked Pilate if he could remove the body of Jesus. And Pilate permitted it. So he came and took his body. Nicodemus, the one who had first come to him at night, also came bringing a mixture of myrrh and aloes weighing about one hundred pounds. They took the body of Jesus and bound it with burial cloths along with the spices, according to the Jewish burial custom. Now in the place where he had been crucified there was a garden, and in the garden a new tomb, in which no one had yet been buried. So they laid Jesus there because of the Jewish preparation day; for the tomb was close by.

Giving One’s Life

We see Jesus in the Passion not as a passive victim, but as one who freely offers himself out of love. He is the one who says: “No one takes my life from me, but I lay it down of my own accord.”
Saint John allows us to contemplate this truth: a God who loves to the very end, who gives his life for his bride, the Church, transforming the wood of the cross into a source of eternal life. Do I give my life for my spouse?

Applied to married life:

Elizabeth: Paul, seeing Jesus in his Passion really gives me a lot to think about, and I see that in our marriage we are called to that same “love to the very end.”
Paul: Yes, Elizabeth, you’re right, but sometimes tiredness or hurt tempt us to “wash our hands” like Pilate or to “deny” like Peter.
Elizabeth: Yes… however, our own Sacrament gives us the grace and strength to give ourselves and lay down our lives in everyday life. To love is the decision to die to oneself so that the other may live. In our mutual self-giving, the world should see Christ’s love.
Paul: You’re absolutely right, but… wow… how difficult it can be sometimes… Shall we pray a bit and ask the Lord for the grace to help us in this mutual self-giving?
Elizabeth: Of course Paul, let’s do it!
Eliabeth and Paul: In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, amen. Lord Jesus, grant us the grace to live our marriage with a sustained “yes,” so that we may give ourselves without reserve at all times, in difficulties and in joys. May our love not be of this world, but a reflection of yours. Amen.

Mother,

You too loved as the Lord did, teach us to love with that same self-giving. Blessed and praised be the Lord.

Let yourself be loved. Reflection for marriages. John 13:1-15

From the Gospel according to John 13:115

Before the feast of Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to pass from this world to the Father. He loved his own in the world and he loved them to the end. The devil had already induced Judas, son of Simon the Iscariot, to hand him over. So, during supper, fully aware that the Father had put everything into his power and that he had come from  God and was returning to God, he rose from supper and took off his outer garments. He took a towel and tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and dry them with the towel around his waist. He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Master, are you going to wash my feet?” Jesus answered and said to him, “What I am doing, you do not understand now, but you will understand later.” Peter said to him, “You will never wash my feet.” Jesus answered him, “Unless I wash you, you will have no inheritance with me.” Simon Peter said to him, “Master, then not only my feet, but my hands and head as well.” Jesus said to him, “Whoever has bathed has no need except to have his feet washed, for he is clean all over; so you are clean, but not all.” For he knew who would betray him; for this reason, he said, “Not all of you are clean.”
So when he had washed their feet and put his garments back on and reclined at table again, he said to them, “Do you realize what I have done for you? You call me ‘teacher’ and ‘master,’ and rightly so, for indeed I am. If I, therefore, the master and teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash one another’s feet. I have given you a model to follow, so that as I have done for you, you should also do.”

Let yourself be loved.

Today, on Holy Thursday, Jesus shows us that to love “to the end” means choosing to love our spouse every day, even when it’s difficult. In married life, washing feet means embracing the weaknesses of one’s husband or wife without judging, serving without measuring, loving in silence. Caring for the small details, those that sustain everyday love.

But in marriage, love is not only about giving; it is also about letting oneself be loved with humility. Like Peter, we sometimes resist being loved, but the Lord also invites us to receive. Mutual service purifies the heart and renews the covenant each day.

We are called to discover the face of Christ in our spouse and to learn to love as He does, making our lives a constant gift to one another, even when the other has dirty feet.

Applied to married life:

It’s 9:30 at night, and the children are already in bed.

Jeff (arrives from work and drops onto the couch): I can’t go on, it’s been a horrible day.

Mary (from the kitchen): I haven’t stopped all day either.

(tense silence)

Mary (sighs, walks over to Jeff): Hey… do you want me to make you something for dinner?

Jeff (looks at her, surprised): Really? But you’re just tired too.

Mary: Yes, but today I want to take care of you.

Jeff (sits up): Then let’s have dinner together, and I’ll clean up afterward.

Mary (smiling): Deal.

Jeff: Sometimes we forget that serving is the simplest way of saying “I love you.”

Mary: Yes. That’s what the Lord teaches us: to serve, to welcome, to heal, to give ourselves, to wash feet. I want to imitate Him.

Jeff: Me too. But we can’t do it alone, we need Him.

Mother,

Teach us to love through small acts of service. Blessed be your precious Son, the servant of all.

I will contemplate Your Passion. Reflection for marriages. Matthew 26:14-25

From the Gospel according to Matthew 26:1425

One of the Twelve, who was called Judas Iscariot, went to the chief priests and said, “What are you willing to give me if I hand him over to you?” They paid him thirty pieces of silver, and from that time on he looked for an opportunity to hand him over.
On the first day of the Feast of Unleavened Bread, the disciples approached Jesus and said,“Where do you want us to prepare for you to eat the Passover?” He said,  “Go into the city to a certain man and tell him, ‘The teacher says, “My appointed time draws near; in your house I shall celebrate the Passover with my disciples.”‘“  The disciples then did as Jesus had ordered, and prepared the Passover.
When it was evening, he reclined at table with the Twelve. And while they were eating, he said, “Amen, I say to you, one of you will betray me.” Deeply distressed at this, they began to say to him one after another, “Surely it is not I, Lord?” He said in reply, “He who has dipped his hand into the dish with me is the one who will betray me. The Son of Man indeed goes, as it is written of him, but woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed. It would be better for that man if he had never been born.” Then Judas, his betrayer, said in reply, “Surely it is not I, Rabbi?” He answered, “You have said so.”

I will contemplate Your Passion.

My dear Lord, how painful this scene is! One of Your friends, betraying You. The rest, doubting themselves. You, completely left alone. It hurts even more when I realize that I, too, have left You alone so many times. Worse still, I have also handed You over to the cross for a few coins. Every sin is handing You over for those “coins”: a moment of pleasure, a “I just really feel like it,” words spoken out of place, a criticism, a lack of self-giving… Lord, it deeply pains me to have handed You over to the cross so many times. There You are, suffering horribly, courged, nailed, broken… because of my sin.

My good Jesus, I do not want to sin anymore. During these holy days, I will contemplate Your Passion, filled with sorrow for what I have done to You. Filled with repentance so as never to do it again. Filled with love for what You have done for me, for giving Yourself up even unto death for my salvation. And filled with hope, to receive all the mercy and grace that flow from Your pierced Heart, so that with the strength of Your Holy Spirit I may live a life of prayer and the sacraments, a life that rejects sin, that desires only to be filled with Your Love in order to give itself like You, to love like You.

I love You so much, Lord! Thank you for everything.

Applied to married life:

 

Cath: Steve, this Holy Week I want it to be special. I want us to truly accompany the Lord in His Passion. To be aware that He gave Himself for us, that that “fear to the point of death,” that sweat of blood, those lashes, that torture, that crucifixion… were for us.

Steve: Yes, it’s incredible what He has had to do for us. It makes me so sad not to have been aware of the seriousness of my sins. Every sin of mine meant that torture for Him. I know that in Confession His Mercy has forgiven me. But since every future sin of mine would add more pain to His suffering, I don’t want to sin anymore. I know I am a sinner, but I’m going to do everything I can not to fall again, to live with determination a life of prayer and the sacraments, and a path of purification of my heart, so that, with His Grace, I may spare Him more suffering.

Cath: Yes, and with the hope of knowing that from His pierced Heart comes everything we need to walk that path of holiness. We have no excuse. He has given us everything we need to achieve it. Let’s go for it with determination!

Mother,

Help us to live these holy days by Your hand, like You, close to Your Son. And filled with gratitude. Blessed and praised be God!