From the Gospel according to Mark. Mk 7:14-23
Jesus summoned the crowd again and said to them, “Hear me, all of you, and understand. Nothing that enters one from outside can defile that person; but the things that come out from within are what defile.”
When he got home away from the crowd his disciples questioned him about the parable.
He said to them, “Are even you likewise without understanding? Do you not realize that everything that goes into a person from outside cannot defile, since it enters not the heart but the stomach and passes out into the latrine?” (Thus he declared all foods clean.) “But what comes out of the man, that is what defiles him. From within the man, from his heart, come evil thoughts, unchastity, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, licentiousness, envy, blasphemy, arrogance, folly. All these evils come from within and they defile.”
The Gospel of the Lotd.
Actually, I love you.
If I don’t experience love towards my spouse in any situation, it is not my spouse´s fault, no matter how badly he or she may be doing. It is my fault and it arises from my heart. It is called sin because I have been created to love.
Applied to married life:
Tessa: James, I have to admit that I’ve been blaming you for my sins for a while. For instance, the other day, I felt offended when you told me I am too emotional, and I accused you of having a hardened heart. That is called revenge, and I apologize.
James: Tessa, I did run away from you when I saw your attitude, and that is called lack of charity, a sin that came from my heart, and I apologize. I didn’t give you what you needed from me then, because I considered it useless, and that is called pusillanimity, and it’s a sin that came from my heart, and I apologize.
Tessa: It’s also true that I started lecturing you with arrogance, and arrogance is a sin that came from my heart. I also apologize for that. You can’t imagine the mess I created in a second… But you should know that I let my passions take over. The truth is that I love you.
James: I love you too, Tessa, and I’m sorry for hurting you with my sins because sin always mistreats. Is there any way I can make it up to you?
May each of us be attentive to our own hearts instead of focusing on the speck in someone else’s eye. Praised be God, who always looks at us with mercy.