To triumph in the battle – Reflection for married couples – Luke 14:25-33

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From the Gospel according to Luke

14:25-33

Great crowds were traveling with Jesus,
and he turned and addressed them,
“If anyone comes to me without hating his father and mother,
wife and children, brothers and sisters,
and even his own life,
he cannot be my disciple.
Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after me
cannot be my disciple.
Which of you wishing to construct a tower
does not first sit down and calculate the cost
to see if there is enough for its completion?
Otherwise, after laying the foundation
and finding himself unable to finish the work
the onlookers should laugh at him and say,
‘This one began to build but did not have the resources to finish.’
Or what king marching into battle would not first sit down
and decide whether with ten thousand troops
he can successfully oppose another king
advancing upon him with twenty thousand troops?
But if not, while he is still far away,
he will send a delegation to ask for peace terms.
In the same way,
anyone of you who does not renounce all his possessions
cannot be my disciple.”

To Triumph in the Battle

A disciple is one who follows the Master so as to have His very heart, and thus to be able to act like Him, live like Him, love like Him. We are wounded by sin and do not know how to love. Even when we try, on our own we cannot. We must first be filled with the love of God, so that our heart may begin to resemble that of Jesus. Then I shall be able to love my husband, my father, mother, children, brothers and sisters, and so forth. That is why the Lord tells us that if we wish to love as He loves, we must first follow Him, carrying our cross. He will give us what we need in order to triumph in the battles against sin.

Brought into Married Life:

(Claire comes home and once again finds everything left in a mess and unclean.)

Claire: Once again everything’s been left lying around… no doubt each one is in their own room doing what they want. (But as she goes to look for her children to scold them, she stops and thinks: I don’t believe this is the right moment to start a war; I shall place myself in the Lord’s hands. She withdraws to her room to pray.)

Claire: Lord, I am weary of the same thing day after day. Yet I know that You are at my side. I shall seek a passage where You show me how to act. (She opens the Gospels and comes upon the passage of the Passion where Jesus looks at Peter after his denial. She reflects on what that look must have been — the gaze of Jesus each time we deny Him and give way to our passions… At that moment Peter arrives.)

Peter: Hello, darling!

Claire: Hello, my love! You know, I feel truly blessed to have you as my husband, to have this family, and above all because the Lord watches over us each day and teaches me how to love and to feel loved by Him.

Peter: I love coming home! Since we did the retreat, everything has changed, and I can see in your eyes the love of God.

Claire: It is a great grace indeed that He has granted us: that we have discovered how He loves us, and so may strive to love like Him in every circumstance of our life.

Peter: Only He can make this possible. Let us continue to trust. I love you, my wife.

Mother,

Do not allow us to turn aside from this way to which You have called us, that You might teach us how to love. Glory be to God!

The union in Christ brings spouses together. Reflection for marriages Saint Luke 6:1-5

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Gospel of the day 
Luke 6:1-5
‘Why are you doing what it is not lawful to do on the Sabbath?’
On a Sabbath, while Jesus was going through the cornfields, his disciples plucked and ate some ears of corn, rubbing them in their hands. But some of the Pharisees said, ‘Why are you doing what is not lawful to do on the Sabbath?’ And Jesus answered them, ‘Have you not read what David did when he was hungry, he and those who were with him: how he entered the house of God and took and ate the bread of the Presence, which is not lawful for any but the priests to eat, and also gave it to those with him?’ And he said to them, ‘The Son of Man is lord of the Sabbath.’

The union in Christ brings spouses together.
Jesus places the needs of human beings above the rigidity of the law. He does not deny the value of the Sabbath but places it in its rightful place, at the service of man. The law is made for man, not man for the law. The purpose of the law is to give the greatest glory to God. In our marriage, sometimes we want our spouse to follow the rules, “what should be,” but we forget that what truly matters is real love, mercy, and knowing his heart. Rules and law without love suffocate, judge, and break communion. We see that Jesus does not remain on the sidelines; He defends His own publicly. In the same way, that is what spouses are called to do: to protect one another. Not allowing the “modern Pharisees” in the form of criticism, social media, or obsessive leisure disguised as necessity to enter into the communion of the heart of our marriage. Just as “the Son of Man is Lord of the Sabbath,” let us persevere in prayer and the sacraments (mystical life), and let us make an effort (ascetical life) so that at all times we may do the Will of God with a simple and humble heart.

Brought down to married life:
Philip: Esther, this week I’m going to train on the bike every day after work because in two weeks I have the race, so don’t count on me for Mass these days or for Saturday catechesis.
Esther: But Philip, it’s very important for us to attend the Eucharist every day, and we had committed to preparing the catechesis.
Philip: You know that it’s my dream to take part in that race, and besides, exercising is really good for my health. I also think I deserve it because work stresses me a lot, and cycling helps me release that stress. You know I’m not the type to go to bars for beers.
Esther: Lord, what am I going to do with this man! … Darling, it saddens me deeply that you put your own well-being before this path of purification of our heart and the communion we are building. I’m going to the room to pray before dinner.
…After a while…
Philip: Can I pray with you, Esther?
Esther: Of course, come, so the three of us can be together.
Philip: I think I was being very selfish, clinging to my own criteria. What if I wake up early these days to do spinning, so we can still go to Mass together?
Esther: Thank you, Lord, for knocking on our door, and my Philip has opened it. A kiss, my love.

Mother,
Thank you because through perseverance in prayer and the sacraments you teach us to make decisions for Him, with Him, and in Him.
Blessed and praised be the Lord.

Good Fruit. Reflection for marriages Saint Luke 5:33-39

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Gospel of the day 

Luke 5:33-39
‘When the bridegroom is taken away from them, then they will fast.’
At that time: The Pharisees and scribes said to him, ‘The disciples of John fast often and offer prayers, and so do the disciples of the Pharisees, but yours eat and drink.’ And Jesus said to them, ‘Can you make wedding guests fast while the bridegroom is with them? The days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast in those days.’ He also told them a parable: ‘No one tears a piece from a new garment and puts it on an old garment. If he does, he will tear the new, and the piece from the new will not match the old. And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the new wine will burst the skins and it will be spilled, and the skins will be destroyed. But new wine must be put into fresh wineskins. And no one after drinking old wine desires new, for he says, “The old is good.”

Good Fruit
Sometimes we offer fasting or sacrifices, but our heart is not joyful—because we are not doing it out of love—and then that sacrifice bears no fruit.
In this passage, the Lord tells us that if He is present, He makes all things new. And if we unite our sacrifice with Him, to offer it to the Father, then it will bear much fruit. He makes all things new: new wine in new wineskins.
If those sacrifices are made with love, He will work in our hearts and in our marriage. Because when we unite them to Him, grace enters through our sacrament.
How many times do I fast but fail to love in my marriage, or in my daily life? Let us do everything for Him, with Him, and in Him, so that our acts of offering may bear abundant fruit.

Applied to Married Life 
Berioska: Hi Carlos, how are you?
Carlos: Well, pretty tired from work.
Berioska: Oh… okay, sorry, I’ll let you be—I’m going to go pray for a while.
Carlos: Wow, she doesn’t even bother to talk with me about the kind of day I’ve had. Why don’t we just chat a little?
But while praying, Berioska realises she should be present with Carlos. So, even though she is very tired, she offers her sacrifice united to the Lord.
Berioska: Darling, forgive me. How was your day? What would you like for dinner?
Carlos: Berioska, my love, with how tired you are, don’t worry about me. Let’s just have something simple…
And after preparing dinner and talking, they sat down to eat together and had a wonderful evening.
Carlos: Thank you, Berioska, because you help me see how the Lord’s Love overcomes tiredness—and everything.
Berioska: Thank you, because you help me see what truly matters.

Mother,
You united yourself to the Lord in His holy sacrifice, even to the extreme of suffering, in order to give us eternal life. Teach us to unite ourselves to Him as you did, to the very end, so that we may bear fruits of life.
Blessed and praised be the Lord!

Out into the Deep with Mary. Reflection for marriages Saint Luke 5:1-11

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Gospel of the day
Luke 5:1-11
‘They left everything and followed him.’
At that time: The crowd was pressing in on Jesus to hear the word of God. He was standing by the lake of Gennesaret, and he saw two boats by the lake, but the fishermen had gone out of them and were washing their nets. Getting into one of the boats, which was Simon’s, he asked him to put out a little from the land. And he sat down and taught the people from the boat. And when he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, ‘Put out into the deep and let down your nets for a catch.’ And Simon answered, ‘Master, we toiled all night and took nothing! But at your word I will let down the nets.’ And when they had done this, they enclosed a large number of fish, and their nets were breaking. They signalled to their partners in the other boat to come and help them. And they came and filled both the boats, so that they began to sink. But when Simon Peter saw it, he fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, ‘Depart from me, for I am a sinful man, O Lord.’ For he and all who were with him were astonished at the catch of fish that they had taken, and so also were James and John, sons of Zebedee, who were partners with Simon. And Jesus said to Simon, ‘Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching men.’ And when they had brought their boats to land, they left
everything and followed him.

Out into the Deep with Mary

If you want a different result, do something different. This idea makes sense, doesn’t it?
In this passage of the miraculous catch of fish, Peter and his companions had been struggling all night without catching anything. Now they are tired, and Jesus tells them to set out again—row out into the deep—and let down their nets. Jesus goes with them.
Without excuses, because they believe and trust in Him, they obey. And the result—against all human logic—is astonishing.
With Him, everything changes. All our actions, however small they may seem, if we do them in His Sacred Heart, take on unimaginable value. He divinises them. We only need faith and trust in Him, in His Word. He makes the work of our hands prosper.

Applied to Married Life
Santiago: Fátima, I’ve been meaning to tell you something: I’ve noticed a change in you—how you look at me, how you care for me, how you show me affection. There’s a special something about it.
Fátima: Oh Santi, I’m so glad! The truth is that lately I’ve been trying to live more closely with Our Lady and in the Sacred Heart of Jesus, and this helps me so much, especially when I’m tired or unmotivated.
Santiago: Well, it really shows. I’m going to try it too.
Fátima: I love that. Let’s both go together with Jesus, out into the deep, into His Heart.
Santiago: This is going to be amazing!

Mother,
We want to be under your mantle and for you to take us by the hand, out into the deep, into the Heart of Jesus.
Blessed are you, and blessed is the fruit of your womb.

To Know / Him / Me / You. Reflection for marriages Saint Matthew 16:13-19

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Gospel of the day 
Matthew 16:13-19
‘You are Peter, and I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven.’
At that time: When Jesus came into the district of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, ‘Who do people say that the Son of Man is?’ And they said, ‘Some say John the Baptist, others say Elijah, and others Jeremiah or one of the prophets.’ He said to them, ‘But who do you say that I am?’ Simon Peter replied, ‘You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.’ And Jesus answered him, ‘Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father who is in heaven. And I tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my Church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.’

To Know / Him / Me / You
A hell where God is loved would be a contradiction—it would cease to be hell. And in the same way, an earth where God is not loved becomes a hell. Let us love God more each day so that this world may begin to resemble heaven more and more.
To love, one must first know. The act of knowing is an exclusive gift of persons, which distinguishes us from animals. In the Bible, to know is not merely an act of the intellect. To know God is to live an experience of Him, and I can have that experience through Jesus Christ, who has come to reveal who He is. That is why the Lord encourages us to follow Him, to live that experience with Him.
The first step is to experience His presence, and then to encounter Him and build that communion of love that reveals His heart. In that experience, I also come to know myself—for I exist only in relation to Him. He gives me my identity, He sustains me, and I exist for Him.
It is the Spirit who reveals Christ’s identity to Peter. It is He who leads me to Christ, and it is Christ who leads me to the Father.
Spouses, this is the reward of prayer: to live in God’s presence, to experience the encounter with Him, and to reach communion with Him—where together we find our rest and eternal life.

Applied to Married Life
Jaime: I have discovered the importance of knowing—knowing God, and knowing you. It is an experience of intimacy meeting intimacy. As I enter into your intimacy, part of you comes with me, and part of me remains within you. And vice versa.
María: It is wonderful to experience the intimacy of God. Some people say they don’t pray because they are tired, but that’s because they don’t know what it means to rest in the Heart of Jesus—the Heart that, even while wounded, loves through its wounds. A love that comforts, fills… And He has taught me to know myself, and to know you, my husband—your masculinity. There is a new gaze within me, able to enter into you. I am present in you, and I sense you present in me. I know you, I have known your intimacy, and your intimacy has entered me. And we have become one flesh.
Jaime: What an experience! And one heart, and one soul. To hold you present in my heart, to encounter you in the deepest part of me, and to feel you within me. It is incredible what can be experienced in marriage, in the presence of God.

Mother,
You carried God in your womb; teach me to carry Him within me. You welcomed the Holy Spirit when He overshadowed you; teach me also to welcome my husband/wife in the same way, so as to bear fruits of love. Only then can we show the world who God is—by knowing Him, by being filled with Him.
Praised be He forever.